I visited the new headquarters for Playboy Cable TV at 5055 Wilshire Blvd in Los Angeles (4/8/99).

I spent an hour schmoozing with Playboy Home Video Senior Producer Eric Mittleman and Helmetcam man Gary Gray. "Playboy cable TV hit its stride about three years ago," said Mittleman, a bald man in his mid'30s who stands about 5'3". "A lot of it had to do with Jim English [President of Playboy Networks Worldwide] coming into the network."

Eric gave me half a dozen videotapes of Playboy shows, including The Profession, a Red Shoe Diaries style series about hookers. "The wraparound is a woman interviewing prostitutes about johns. It's funky and got cool visuals."

Greg Dark shot the first two editions a year ago before hitting it big as a music video maker.

"The Playboy production process is just like any other TV show or movie," said Mittleman. "Mainly the post-production is much more involved than hardcore. I've visited a couple of hardcore places and they're cutting from camera masters. And they're online [editing] is their offline. There's no real process or preparation there. It's just two people going at it...

"About two years ago we hit a production groove of designing stuff for the soft core market. Shows like Nightcalls, Strip Search, Sex Court... On last night's show [Nightcalls], we pushed the limits. I think the host of the show talked on the Howard Stern show about how lawyers come down to the set and say you can spread your legs at this angle, and not that angle. Last night we were able to go this angle [widespread] because we were demonstrating dental dams. The girls were covered with a think pink latex.

"Every article you every read about safe sex mentions dental dams. But I've never used one... So I sent my assistant out to get 16 for the show..."

Mittleman flipped through the sex channels on his cable TV outlet, as we observed and discussed the differences between Playboy, Spice (owned by Playboy) and Spice Hot, now owned by Vivid. Spice Hot shows penetration but no cum shots or anal sex. Playboy is the softest of the three, but all three are getting raunchier. Spice and Spice Hot tend to air the same movie at the same time, said Mittleman.

"This is Playboy's Most Wanted," narrates Eric as we watch naked women gyrate on screen. "And each edition we focus on a body part. This is Private Parts." We watch pussy shots.

Regarding male erections, Eric says Playboy has a 45 degree rule. Up to 45 degrees, erections are ok. More than that, forbidden. We have a lot more women at Playboy Channel now... I have no desire to look at erect penises. Women want to see erect penises, at the women at this channel do."

Eric has a beautiful blonde girlfriend (and a tall sexy personal assistant).

"TeN is Playboy's only competition. Spice Hot is more of a friendly relationship. When we bought Spice, we had to find a buyer for Spice Hot. Because of the longstanding relationship between Vivid and Playboy, Steve Hirsch was the natural person to go to.

"If nudity drove people to the magazine, it is sex that drove people to the [Playboy cable tv] channel.

"I've been here eight years, doing Hot Rocks, which was non-nude wraparounds of music videos. You might occasionally see a breast or some explicit language... Then I started Nightcalls and Strip Search three years for the new Playboy. Until Jim English arrived, we did no taped movies. Everything was film. And what's been most successful has been the reality-based shows while anything that is narrative is competing with new releases [mainstream and hardcore] and doesn't do as well.

"We kinda have ratings, such as buy rates for a night. We purposefully put Nightcalls on a Wednesday night because it was a dead night for us.

"Before the channel, they had PlayboyVideo Magazine (in the early 1980s), which, when the channel started, grew into Playboy Home Video. If the budget is under $100,000 an hour, it's a TV show. If it's $250,000 an hourm it's a home video shot on film."

Luke: "Is it true that Playboy Playmates have to sign a release that they will not do pornography?"

Eric: "I don't think they have to sign a release. But from the Playmates I've dealt with, once you've dealt with women who are going to take some amount of clothing off for a living, they all have that limits. For strippers, the topless girls hate the full-nude girls and the full-nude girls say, 'oh, we don't like her because she spreads.Or does lap dancing.'

"Most of the girls who become Playmates, Playboy is all she will ever do. Even to get a Playmate to do her video with a guy somehwere in the video, not necessarily having contact, is a major accomplishment. They do pledge to not do any nude work for anyone else for 18 months.

"The internet has taken off so well because it eliminates the gate keepers. The only thing that stops pornography from being multi multi-billions is the gatekeepers. You get jaded in Los Angeles and New York because you can get pornography. If you live in Des Moine, there'd be that one store 20 miles away, a shack in the middle of nowhere. Thanks to the internet, once you punch in your credit card, you get live sex 24 hours a day.

"I think the [porn] industry is f---ed in the head because everyone is competing for a slice of the pie that is already there. I hear the same thing from people at every single major porn company. Everyone is thinking, 'how can we get our numbers up, to sell movie A over movie B.' Instead of, 'how do we expand the audience?'

"The audience is out there because the curiosity is out there. I literally can't go anywhere without someone asking me a million questions, 'what's it like to work with this person or that person?' So, the curiosity is there but the accessibility isn't. The industry's challenge (and Wicked has done some good things in this direction because many of their girls have hosted shows on E! [channel]) is to get that guy in Des Moine who wouldn't normally buy a porn film. He sees her on TV, thinks, 'wow, she's hot,' and then he clicks on the computer and buys something.

"But then there are downsides to the expansion of pornography. It's a Catch 22 because you can only get a real perspective on the business by working in the business.

"What's the difference between pornography and obscenity? I don't think it's pornography to watch two people have sex on screen. I think it's obscene to give them $200 apiece and then not pay royalties on it. I just come from an artist's perspective. If you're creating a film of visual entertainment, you should share in the profits, which is never going to happen."

Eric Mittleman Eric Helmetcam Man Gary Gray Helmetcam man with (L-R) Juli Ashton, Alexandra Silk, Helmet, Tiffany and Sydney

Luke: "Do you really have a big long black dick?"

Gary Gray: "That's an actual likeness. Not many people would expect me to have a 24-inch doubleheader down there, but I'm chockfull of surprises."

Helmetcam Man aka Gary Gray, for his day job, dubs programs into Brazilian Portugeese, Latin American Spanish, and Castilian Spanish for the overseas branches of Playboy cable TV. I'm responsible for making sure that all the top women in the adult business speak foreign languages.

Eric asks Gary for a copy of the tape Best of Night Calls. It's a very small tape. Ba boom.

Gary: "We've found that when we language dub it, it looks better than the original because at least they're now moaning in sync."

Eric: "The two professional organizations that don't usually do adult content love us - Close Captioning Institute for Night Calls and a translation service."

Gary: "Mom and dad didn't know what to name me. They were at a Red Sox game in Boston. They decided that whoever hits the next home run, that's who we will name him after. So Rico Petraselli lines one out of the Park. So they say, so much for that, I guess we'll call him Gary. True story."

Eric: "Rico Gray as the Helmetcam man."

"I created him."

Gary: "He put the helmet on my head. I came up with the personality."

Eric: "I was hot off the trail of watching Jenny McCarthy's career, so I figured Gary would be my next one.

"It's a typical Playboy story. Nightcalls is a successful 90-minute show. Some bean counter decided that we could do an extra half hour at virtually no cost. I said, 'that's no longer TV. That's radio. As it is, I think Nightcalls should be an hour long.' They said, great, just fill that half hour and spend no money doing it."

Luke: "Gary."

Gary: "They brought me in for $5 a show. And then I realized what they were paying everyone else, and I got it up to $10. I didn't have an agent. Now the half hour costs them a big bundle of money."

Luke to Gary: "Did you ever f--- Jenny McCarthy?"

Gary: "I was not inclined to go down that road. I couldn't give her her sitcom deals that she needed."

Eric: "Yeah, and you weren't married."

Gary: "One of my early jobs for Eric, when Jenny was a Playmate, was picking Jenny up from the [Playboy] mansion and taking her wherever we were shooting when I was PAing for the company. She was one of the first Playmates I met who had a personality. The average girl back then did not have much to say, before Playboy became so multi-media."

Eric didn't f--- Jenny either. "From the day we hired her, she was dating her manager behind her manager's wife's back."

Luke: "How do you spell his name?"

Eric: "P-I-G. No, Ray Manzella."

Luke: "She wasn't interested in you, even though you created her?"

Gary: "She won't even return his phonecalls, that bitch.

"My best Jenny story. We were at a party and talking. And David Spade came over, who's big on Saturday Night Live, and he's trying to work on her. And she says, 'do you mind leaving us alone, I'm talking to Gary.' And he was shocked. I was just a lowly PA then.

"My first paying job in Hollywood was as a PA for Playboy, but I didn't know it at the time. I was 22 years old, fresh in town from Boston. I worked on a free short movie and the coordinator really liked me and asked if I wanted to work on this thing next week. So, the day before the shoot, she calls me up. 'I know you're supposed to start at 7AM, but I need you to start at 6AM, because you have to pick up the Playmates.'

"I said, 'Why do I have to pick them up first thing in the morning, I'll pick them up tonight and keep them in my house. It seems foolish to get out this early in the morning. Everything's going to be closed.' She said, 'what are you talking about? Not those kind of playmates. Playboy Playmates.'"

Eric: "If you meet any Playmate from the '70s, the first thing she'll tell you is, 'you really missed the great days.'"

Gary: "I go to my first Playboy shot and am completely flustered. All these gorgeous women are walking around naked."

Luke to Eric: "Has success spoiled him?"

Eric: "No, Gary is the only one who keeps thanking me for putting him in the position he is..."

Gary: "It certainly has jaded me. You can't spend years around these women and not view life and sex differently. I had Houston on my show last night. She just did her 620 person gangbang. Just one more eye opening experience. The best email I got today about last night's show simply said, 'well, that was interesting.'"

Eric: "When Jenny's TV series got cancelled, I called her manager and offered her work in craft service. He's not fond of me.

"When Jenny left Playboy for her MTV career, she did it in a bad way, badmouthing where she came from, just like Traci Lords denied she was a porn star. Jenny McCarthy hosted Hot Rocks [on Playboy TV] for three years before she went to MTV. The only reason she got to audition for the MTV gig was because of an interview she did on Hot Rocks with Paulie Shore."

Gary: "The true pinnacle of interviewing is, can you hold your own against Paulie Shore."

Eric: "The only time I've heard Jenny McCarthy mention Hot Rocks was a line in her book. 'The only bone that Playboy ever threw me was that they allowed me to host this cable show Hot Rocks.' She didn't mention all the training we put her through."

Gary: "I mention Eric in every interview I do."

7/20/01

Former Playboy Night Calls producer Eric Mittleman phoned from his new job Creative Light Entertainment where he's starting its film division.

When his contract expired last November, Eric jumped to a reality TV company that thought up the National Enquirer UNCOVERED show.

Eric: "We're doing some softcore movies [at CLE]. And some horror films and comedy. They're basically a film distribution company and they wanted to launch a production division. The guy who brought me here brought me to Playboy ten years ago - Scott Zakran.

"I've been here two weeks.

"My own sensibilities are more in the PG13-R rated world. We're making adult movies [not pornographic]."

Lunch With Eric Mittleman
2002-10-31 09:32:21

I've known Eric for five years, since his days producing Nightcalls and other shows for Playboy, through his tenure at Danni's Harddrive to his present position at Creative Light Entertainment.

4/8/99

From l-keford.com:

I visited the new headquarters for Playboy Cable TV at 5055 Wilshire Blvd in Los Angeles. I spent an hour schmoozing with Playboy Home Video Senior Producer Eric Mittleman (a bald man in his mid'30s who stands about 5'3") and Helmetcam man Gary Gray.

"About two years ago we hit a production groove of designing stuff for the soft core market. Shows like Nightcalls, Strip Search, Sex Court... On last night's show [Nightcalls], we pushed the limits. I think the host of the show talked on the Howard Stern show about how lawyers come down to the set and say you can spread your legs at this angle, and not that angle. Last night we were able to go this angle [widespread] because we were demonstrating dental dams. The girls were covered with a thin pink latex."

Eric has a beautiful blonde girlfriend (and a tall sexy personal assistant).

Q to Gary: "Did you ever f-ck Jenny McCarthy?"

Gary: "I couldn't give her her sitcom deals that she needed."

Eric: "Yeah, and you weren't married."

Gary: "One of my early jobs for Eric, when Jenny was a Playmate, was picking Jenny up from the [Playboy] mansion and taking her wherever we were shooting when I was PAing for the company. She was one of the first Playmates I met who had a personality. The average girl back then did not have much to say, before Playboy became so multi-media."

Eric didn't f-ck Jenny either. "From the day we hired her, she was dating her manager behind her manager's wife's back."

10/30/02

Eric: "Creative Light started out as a distribution company and expanded into production. They acquired the rights to distribute the animated movie AirTroopers that needed a full audio redo. If any of my relatives anywhere in the world ask what I'm working on, I don't have to candycoat, spin, or do any of the things I did while working at Playboy. Then I couldn't tell my four-year old niece about female ejaculation. It's not socially acceptable.

"That helps you ease into a more normal life, as normal as Hollywood can be. It's a lot cooler being stopped on the street because you are walking down the street with Mark Hamill than Jenna Jameson. If it's a picture with Jenna Jameson, I'm ducking out of the frame. There's so much of life that comes back to you when [you work in mainstream as opposed to adult entertainment]."

Luke: "It's like a burden off your shoulders."

Eric: "Yeah. You don't realize..."

Luke: "The strain that you were under..."

Eric: "The stuff you would do to compensate... Even just sitting here like this in a restaurant talking about Hollywood entertainment. It's not like looking up to see someone's shocked expression because you said 'anal.'"

Luke: "How does your girlfriend [of five years] feel about your switch?"

Eric: "She likes it. I met her while we both worked at Playboy. She worked in post-production. Even then there was a certain amount of 'ohmigod, look at what he does for a living.'

"There are friends from that business that I would keep in touch with but I don't know if it's the flake factor, or if they feel out of their element around non-adult stuff, but they don't keep in touch. Once in a while I'll talk with Gary Gray at Playboy. There's some overlapping crew that I know. I keep in touch with some of the executives at Playboy.

"I know the principle partner at Creative Light, Scott Zakarin, from high school. Scott brought me into Playboy in 1991 because he was running the on-air promo department. Scott left in 1993 to join an advertising company. He created The Spot in 1993, the first online soap opera. It was just text and pictures. He left The Spot and started Lightspeed Media, which also does online entertainment. He then formed a partnership with Brandon Tartikoff called Entertainment Asylum. It was bought by AOL in 1995. Brandon passed away. Six months later, they laid everyone off and bought out their contracts.

"With some of his AOL money, Scott and Rich Tackenberg started Creative Light Media in 1998. Peter Jayson (former producer of Dateline and TV documentaries) came in as a partner. They pursued production and distribution deals, making the kids video The Adventures of Cinderella's Daughter.

"In October of 2000, as my contract with Danni's Harddrive was coming to an end, I talked with Scott. They had a movie called Magenta, an erotic drama, which sold well for them. With my Playboy background, it made sense for me to produce a movie in that genre (became Forbidden) - something for late night cable TV, softcore, Showtime, Cinemax, HBO. HD24P technology was just coming on the seen. It's high definition digital video that George Lucas used for Star Wars episode two and Robert Rodriguez used for Spy Kids. Almost all the CBS primetime shows are shot in high def. It looked as good as 16mm and approached the quality of 35mm.

"We then pulled the trigger on another movie in that genre - Voyeur Beach. I wrote and produced both erotic flicks. Then the bottom fell out of that marketplace in 2001 because of competition from hardcore. Playboy bought the hardcore cable channels. Our profits halved.

"While making these movies, we made some straight-to-video reality programs. We produced a 90-minute interview show with Leonard Nimoy and William Shatner called Mind Meld. It's Nimoy and Shatner sitting down and talking about Star Trek and how it influenced their lives. It's a nice warm show. If you like Star Trek, you'll love the show. An interviewer could not do an interview with either of these men as well as they interview each other. The success of the video opened up many distribution avenues for the company."

JLS writes on imdb.com: "Shatner and Nimoy couldn't be more different. Yes, they were born four days apart -- as we find out at the beginning of the film -- and their careers following similar arcs, but their professional concerns and personal problems diverged radically. Nimoy, the actor's actor, and Shater, the comedian, approached the roles from different perspectives. Their Trek journeys, although documented in more detail elsewhere, are discussed with benefit of age-weary hindsight."

Eric: "Scott is friends with Stan Lee [created Marvel comics in the 1960s]. Spiderman was coming out and getting a huge marketing push. We decided to do an interview show with Stan Lee and Kevin Smith [director of Dogma, Chasing Amy, Clerks] and then we enhanced it with Marvel images. Sony bought the show from us and it is going to be part of the Spiderman gift pack coming out.

"After that, we started production on a low budget horror film [Inhuman] which I co-wrote and co-produced. Actress Chase Masterson, who has a huge following among the sci-fi audience, signed on so we decided to make it as a SAG film. We shot over the summer and we're in post-production now. It's heavily inspired by classic horror movies like Creature From The Black Lagoon.

"William Shatner was doing a charity event in Jolliet, Illinois, to benefit the Hollywood Horse Show, a charity for kids. He sponsored a 1500-person paintball tournament in a $5 million paintball park. He went to Paramount and got permission to use the team names Federation Klingon and Borg and use jerseys that look like uniforms. He plays a Captain Kirk-like character in charge of the Federation in this battle. It was too good of an opportunity not to bring out a whole bunch of cameras and shoot. We brought 12 cameras and created William Shatner's Spplat Attack. It's Star Trek meets Survivor with a paintball twist. That will show on pay per view December 10 and in stores December 12.

"We have a longstanding relationship with Sid Caesar. We remastered all his Show of Shows. We interviewed many of his old writers like Woody Allen, Mel Brooks, Carl Reiner, Neil Simon... We've released these as DVD sets, websites and merchandise.

"We're looking for other icons to develop relations with. I'm connected with Mark Hammil through mutual friends. He has a huge passion for collecting comic books. We've developed a project called "Comic Book: The Movie." It's an unscripted movie shot on digital video over four days during Comic-con in San Diego in August. We shot over 80 hours of material that we're now trying to edit down to a 90-minute movie."

Luke: "Why do you think Playboy.com hasn't made money?"

Eric: "It's too big. It's an old company. Try explaining the internet to your parents or grandparents. They'll get it eventually but they won't be surfing like a 15-year old in an hour. When I was at Danni's, which is hugely profitable, they tried many times to get meetings over at Playboy to pitch some managerial consulting deal. Playboy didn't know how to manage that business, especially with the huge amount of free content available to the web site from other aspects of the business.

"As Playboy sinks more into hardcore, it becomes just another hardcore company with a good reputation. Hef did a cameo in Comic Book: The Movie. We did a 50-minute interview with him about comic books. I've never seen Hef more alert, alive, witty and fun than during this interview, just because he was talking about something other than Playboy. I realized that for eight-and-a-half years, I'd been watching the man regurgitate poorly written press releases. Here he's finally talking about something he has real expertise in. He's not just trying to put a dollar in his pocket.

"The company has strayed so far away from what the magazine was... I think the company will coast until Hef passes away and then AOL/Time Warner will buy them."

Luke: "What was behind your move to Dannis?"

Eric: "I was really unhappy at Playboy during my last two years there. Just the bad management decisions they made and being forced to work with some incompetent people. I met Danni when we did a show called "Playboy's Hard Drive," which was a show we did looking at sexy websites. We stayed in touch.

"I didn't get into entertainment to do erotic material. My work for Playboy had a false prestige for it. I used to say to myself, 'If I'm going to do this kind of material, at least I'm doing it for Playboy. I'm not doing it for Vivid or Wicked.'

"Eventually, Danni and her husband came up with such a good offer. Did I want to make less money working for people I can't stand or make more money working for people I liked? It was no choice.

"It was November 1999. We were shooting in Jamaica. Somehow Playboy had developed a policy that significant others weren't supposed to go on field trips. My girlfriend wants to go to Jamaica. My life is going to be a lot more difficult if I don't take her to Jamaica.

"I decided we would go down a week early. She stayed the entire time. My executive producer [Tamara Wells], who tried to fire me a number of times and was basically the reason I quit, was on the phone to LA from Jamaica complaining that I'd brought my girlfriend down. I get off the plane in LA, go to the office and quit. Cut to a year later, a new producer they hired is now living with Juli Ashton, and Flower, host of Nightcalls 411 is pregnant with the director's child. So much for the policy against fraternization.

"In late 1999, Danni had just built a huge production facility and they didn't know how to work with."

Luke: "You had a dream of doing a lot of special things at Dannis?"

Eric: "Some of those became impractical because of the way the internet went. While I was there, I started 24/7tv.com. It was going to be short-form programming for the internet. This was the time of companies like DEN (Digital Entertainment Network) were collapsing. I realized I could do better by myself, with a $1000 camcorder, and a Mac and my rolodex.

"I called celebrity friends like [rapper] Ice T, [actor] Billy Dee Williams, and Steve Schirripa, then the entertainment director at the Riviera in Las Vegas and now an actor on Sopranos. I just knew that someone one day would point a camera at Steve and make a lot of money. We shot a lot of short web interstitials and the plan was to pursue sponsorship. As the web fell apart, things like that totally fell apart.

"We found at Dannis that the stuff that got the biggest response wasn't bigger productions but it was more intimate home movies. People would rather see home movies from Cancun than a more expensive elaborate parody production."

Luke: "Like Bra Wars."

Eric: "That was made by Dean Guilotis who has been with Dannis a long time. He worked for me. He did all the work. When my contract was coming up at Dannis, I had nothing against anyone there. It's just that they were paying me a lot of money to do very little. It was time to move on. A lot of people like me were derailed by the internet. I was happy to get back to mainstream big productions on a big screen. I couldn't be happier than what I'm doing now. I'm working with friends. We're doing shows that I would actually watch."

From Daily Variety 10/30/02: "NEW YORK -- The Sci Fi Channel has signed a two-picture deal with actor Bruce Campbell, who will not only star in "The Man With the Screaming Brain" but will write, produce and direct it. Campbell, known to sci-fi fans as the star of Sam Raimi's "Evil Dead" feature film trilogy, will do "Screaming Brain" and the second original movie "Earwigs," with Creative Light Entertainment. Prexy-CEO of Creative Light Scott Zakarin will be co-executive producer of both movies with Campbell."

Luke: "You're like Elie Samaha. You've found a niche forming good relationships with celebrities and finding projects they really want to make and making it happen. You're like John Travolta with Battlefield Earth. You need to start making some Scientology films."

Eric: "It's not an immediate plan but if Travolta knocks on our door... The difference between us and Elie Samaha's company (we do have a lot of similarities) aside from that he knows bigger stars because he was in the nightclub business, is that we're a distribution company. A lot of what we do is greenlit based on marketing costs. We knew before we greenlit Inhuman that Japan was looking for monsters that were big and scary."

Luke: "Are there any star vehicles for [porn star] Juli Ashton planned?"

Eric: "If I was going to pull anyone from that world for something, it's probably be Juli. We had a scene in Comic Book: The Movie where we needed some girls, not nude, for a party scene. I invited Juli at the last minute through a mutual friend but I have a feeling that the invitation did not get to her in the way it was intended. The response was, 'No, she just turned down American Pie 3.'"

Luke: "If you had to cast a porn star, aside from Juli, in an acting role, who would you choose?"

Eric: "The adult business is so different. I've never seen an adult actor, aside from Steven St. Croix, analyze a character. I just think of the research real actors do for a part. I just read an interview with Selma Hayak who did the movie Frida. She spent months painting reproductions of the paintings Friday painted so she could get into Frida's head space. Could you imagine a porn star who has to play a pizza delivery guy working as a pizza delivery guy for a week? 'Oh, I play the sexy pool woman, so I am going to go dredge pools for a month.' Getting into character in the adult world means something entirely different.

"If you need a hot sexy actress to play a porn star, it's a lot hotter to see Jennifer Love Hewett try to do it than a real porn star. What have been the big porn star crossover roles? Jenna Jameson in the Howard Stern movie playing herself. Kobe Tai in Very Bad Things playing a hooker who gets killed. Ginger Lynn in Young Guns. The only one who has come close to crossing over is Traci Lords and she went through a stage where noone would hire her. After she put in the work to become an actress, she got good and booked bigger roles. In Blade 2, I didn't even realize I was watching Traci Lords."

Luke: "How's Greg Dark?"

Eric: "He's making 12-15 big budget music videos a year. He's promised features but nothing's been finalized. I've always wanted to do something mainstream with Greg, something action-oriented. I asked Greg two years ago what he would do if he had money and didn't have to work. He said he'd be a martial arts instructor. Greg is holding out for a feature with a guaranteed theatrical release. That's difficult. Seagal can barely get a guaranteed theatrical."

The Girls Next Door

Eric Mittleman (a producer at Playboy TV for nine years who's now producing the E! show Kill Reality) calls me back Sunday afternoon, October 2, 2005, to talk about the Hugh Hefner reality show on E! -- The Girls Next Door.

Eric has seen four episodes. "To do a reality show on Hugh Hefner's life is kind of a contradiction in terms because his life is so unreal.

"It was bold of him to do it.

"I find the show entertaining. The mansion was way different when I was working at Playboy. Obviously they are only showing the fun side of things there. There are things that seem contrived, like in any reality show, such as when Bobby Benton came to visit.

"Having said so many negative things in the past about Playboy, and having put some distance between myself and my experience there, I've regretted a lot of things I've said. You really can't say anything bad about Hef. He's a generous guy. He gave the world this wonderful gift of nice girls like sex too.

"I'm looking at the show wanting to like it, as opposed to looking at the show wanting to hate it, as many people do.

"I went to the mansion dozens of times, but aside from half a dozen occasions, I was there as the help, producing and directing shows. It's way different going there as a guest. Once you take the performance aspect out of it, it's a cool place."

Luke: "How would you do the show differently if you were producing it?"

Eric: "More well-rounded Hef. The producers of the show probably have the dilemma that this guy is the [titular] head of this multi-million dollar empire and his time is going to be limited and what he wants to expose to the world.

"One of my best experiences with Hef was when I produced Comic Book: The Movie, directed by Mark Hamill. Hef did a cameo for Mark, which he was wonderful in. There was no talk of naked women or sex. Just purely a scene where he was talking about comic books. He really came alive in a way that I've never seen him come alive before.

"For the past half century, he's been able to have sex with the most beautiful women on the planet. That is a super power that none of us will ever possess. Superman thinks nothing about flying. Hef thinks nothing about snapping his fingers and having sex with a bunch of beautiful women."

Luke: "The show's had overwhelmingly horrible reviews."

Eric: "I can see why the world wouldn't like it, but I know there's more to the mansion and more to Hef and more to Playboy than what they're showing to the world."

Luke: "It's impossible to sell because it's inherently creepy to have this old man leching off these young women."

Eric: "It's creepy but it's nothing new. It's existed back to the time of kings and emperors and cavemen. I turned 40 a couple of years ago. You hope that at 70 you have that same ability. What's a little creepy about the show, what I would do differently about the show, is that I don't see the real bond of intimacy between him and the girlfriends. It does seem like they are there for show. We know that circumstance and greed breed a different type of love, which is what we see on the show. We're not seeing what lies beneath and where that true affection is. We're seeing unnatural relationships. Married porn stars have always been a mystery to me. Marriage is supposed to be about monogamy."

Luke: "Hefner has the bond of intimacy with the girls that an old man has with young women he pays to have sex with. It's a hooker-john relationship."

Eric: "If that is the bond, that should be explored and celebrated. When people hide from things, that's when the audience turns on them, which might be happening with the show. Whatever that relationship is, whether it is hooker-john, the father they never had, any of the stereotypes, that bond needs to be more openly explored and embraced by the participants on the show.

"Based on my experience with Playboy and Hef, I don't think that's a bond that would ever be explored openly. I don't think anyone looks down on Charlie Sheen for admitting he abused Heidi Fleiss's services. This is a different flavor of that type of relationship.

"A couple of years ago, Hef sold 2% of his stock and got $50 million. I don't know what I would do if I could get $50 million. I'd probably go nuts. I'd probably take you to Vegas and go to Smokers. How different is that from Hef?

"I've never heard a bad word about Hef from those who knew him best. The guy's carved out his own world (which he thrives in and has warped his perceptions) which might be why the show hasn't synced with its audience. He really hasn't been in the world in the last 30 years. The girls are not really in touch with the world either. They're one step from dumb. Surrounding yourself with women like that... The best part of leaving Playboy was becoming friends with smart women who do not look like Playmates. Some of them are plain-looking. I'm plain-looking. That's my position in the world.

"The aspect of nudity and being on the softer end of the sex business alienates a lot of people.

"Hef is smart. He does a disservice to himself by not surrounding himself with smart women like he did in the 70s. If you look at the magazine in the 70s, it had all the celebrated intellectuals. Now it is all pop culture, and not even the luminaries of pop culture. It's bubblegum."

The Girls Next Door

Ray Richmond writes in the Hollywood Reporter:

What's potentially most interesting here is what isn't shown or discussed -- namely, what their true physical relationship is with Hefner and whether this really is the big happy family they all claim it to be. Chinks already are showing in the armor by the end of the opener when Holly, who is Hefner's acknowledged No. 1, admits, "Well, I'm a people person, so I like having Bridget and Kendra around, but I'd rather have Hef to myself." There isn't much outward affection seen on camera between the women and Hefner, as if he's most interested in the women as Barbie doll-resembling trophies than anything akin to true mates. If that's the reality of mansion life, then give us back the fantasy, please.

Hugh Hefner's Girlfriends

About Hugh Hefner's girlfriends, he dumped all but three last summer. The ones that were let go last year were Sheila Levell, Lana Kinnear, Cristal Camden (although she did accompany Hef and current girlfriends to this year's Super Bowl activities in Florida) and Zoe Gregory Paul. After Holly Madison, Zoe had been there the second longest. Holly joined the girlfriend group towards the end of 2001. Sandee Westgate was also briefly a part of the girlfriend posse but didn't last too long.

I've been told that being in the group was similar to a beauty version of Survivor. Think sabotage like Nair in your shampoo or nasty rumors being spread. Zoe was always on Hef's right for photos and even when sitting; I saw her hustle Bridget Marquardt out of seat to Hef's right during the Playboy special that ran on A&E last summer. Bridget looked taken aback, but Zoe had an arrogant self satisfied smile on her face after it was done. Bridget was a cyber girl of the week. Cristal was on the Playboy Xtreme team, but never made it into any Playboy publications or even the website. Zoe was in numerous Playboy Special Editions.

Lana Kinnear and Sheila Levell were both cyber girls of the week. Holly was a cyber girl of the week, but her layout was pulled two days after it was posted because she was up for a Hollywood movie role and having publicly done nudity would have affected her chances of getting the role. Holly used to post on the Playboy message boards and so did Bridget, but they've stopped.

Here are Hefner's other girlfriends:

Tiffany Holliday (Playboy Cyber Girl of the Week)
Stacy Burke (appeared in a Special Edition, I think)
Renee Sloan (owns and designs a lingerie line)
Christie Shake (Miss May 2000)
Charis Boyle (Miss February 2003 - supposedly comes from a very wealthy East coast family with Washington ties)
Katie Lohmann (Miss February 2002 ?)
Stephanie Heinrich (first ever cyber girl and Miss October 2001)
Bentley Twins (Playboy cover girls)
Brande Roderick (Playmate of the Month and Playmate of the Year)
Jessica Paisley (reviled on a popular Playboy mailing list as Hef's only girlfriend that no amount of plastic surgery could turn into a Playmate)
Buffy Tyler (who said on Howard Stern that she was asked to leave the mansion for disobeying Hef - Miss November 2000, I have seen footage from that era of her and Hef and she seemed a special favorite)
Tina Jordan (lived at the mansion with her kid and Hef paid for the nanny - Miss March 2002)
Teri Harrison (Miss October 2002 and the last Playmate to have the cover of her centerfold issue)

The girls get $1,000 a week, free room and board, free maid service, free dry cleaning, free healthcare, and a shopping allowance. They have a strict curfew and if they are not back on time, they are locked out of the mansion. The girls are expected to spend holidays with Hef. There are planned outings every week and the girls have to attend. Every Thursday and Saturday night, the gang goes out on the town (Hef has to approve of their outfits before they leave the mansion.) and the girls either come back drunk or high on Esctacy.

Once home, they either have to have sex with Hef or with each other (even if they aren't attracted to each other). Finally, they can't have other boyfriends besides Hef.

You won't see any more girlfriends as Playmates, because Hef didn't like the way that the ones who had the honor bestowed upon them discarded him immediately after their centerfolds ran. Allegedly, Brande Roderick was promised 2001 Playmate of the Year even before it was announced that she'd be a Playmate. It has often been rumored most frequently that Shannon Stewart won the Playmate of the Year vote that year, with Brooke Berry in second place; Brande was much further behind, not even in the top five for the honor. Jillian Grace, Miss March 2005, was gifted her title as part of a publicity deal that Playboy made with the Howard Stern Show.

There was nothing accidental about Howard 'discovering' Jillian Grace and her becoming a Playmate. It was revealed on the Playboy boards by Miss October 2003, Audra Lynn (I've also heard that she was promised a Playmate spot shortly after she was discovered by Playboy scouts).

I don't like the idea of the Playboy reality show. Its not a good idea to allow daylight in upon magic. They need to maintain the Playboy mystique because that is a big part of the brand.

5/2/06

Eric Mittleman (emittlema@playboy.com) Returns To Playboy

He calls me back Tuesday afternoon. He's producing Jenna's American Sex Star reality show after six years out of porn.

Eric: "It's American Idol for porn stars and the prize is a year-long contract with Club Jenna.

"My challenge is to bring more mainstream elements into it, more elements of reality TV. The shows last year seem too fantasy-driven.

"I've known Jenna Jameson for over ten years. She worked for me at Playboy. I referred to her as the Jenny McCarthy of porn.

"A friend of mine ran into Jenna at Fashion Week in New York a couple of months ago. She said hello to me through him. It got me thinking about her career. If people want to talk about the mainstreaming of porn, she's a case study.

"She's a cultural icon but she doesn't carry herself like a cultural icon. The only thing obscene about her was her watch. It was big, gold, jeweled. I'm sure she worked hard for it."

Luke: "Why did you come back to Adult?"

Eric: "I had a hole in my schedule. They met my quote. There's no reason not to go back. I had left Playboy under strange terms. Now that I have perspective, it was nothing against the company, but it was a conflict with another producer. I was warmly welcomed back.

"I've spent the past couple of years working with sci-fi icons such as William Shatner and Mark Hamill. Jenna is an icon. I run into 23yo girls on MySpace who are obsessed with Jenna but have never seen a movie. She's like Hef was in the fifties."

Luke: "Weren't you glad to be out of Adult?"

Eric: "I was hugely glad to be out of Adult. You need a balance in your life. One of my favorite quotes is from Ice-T: 'Life is rated XXX, not R.'

"I've produced a thousand hours for Playboy TV that I can't undo. Producing four more hours is not going to destroy me."

Luke: "What happened to your mainstream career?"

Eric: "I have a bunch of mainstream projects in the works. When I did The Scorned movie and Kill Reality TV show last summer, it knocked me into another league. The projects are bigger but they take longer to come together."

Luke: "Will this hurt your mainstream career?"

Eric: "I hope not. It took a lot of thought for me to come back and it took a lot of thought for me not to use an alias."

Luke: "Is this show primarily masturbation fuel?"

Eric: "When I left Playboy TV, the producing and editing styles were all aimed at shows you can masturbate to. A Jim English thing. The network now is more about interesting sexy TV. I tried to masturbate to one of the shows and was not terribly successful. It did eventually work and I thank Brea Bennett..."

Luke: "You want to make entertainment that people can watch with their pants up?"

Eric: "They can watch it however they enjoy it most. HBO doesn't tell me how to watch the Sopranos."

Luke: "You don't feel you're sullying your soul by doing this?"

Eric: "My soul was sullied a long time ago. We're not pulling a waitress out of a restaurant and making her an Adult star. All the contestants in the show are already in the Adult business and want to be contract girls. Morally, I'd have a problem taking some waitress and convincing her she should be a porn star."

Luke: "How would you compare and contrast reality stars and porn stars?"

Eric: "Porn stars are easier to deal with. There's a short list of reality stars who would be porn stars if it weren't for reality TV. Different things drive both groups but the common thread is the desire to be seen and noticed. Porn stars are more fun and reality stars have more issues.

"There are many types of porn that are the ultimate form of reality TV. Even on Kill Reality, people were obsessed with who was sleeping with who. You just weren't seeing it, unless you had the raw footage like we did. On the Real World, same thing."

Luke: "Do you think Jenna Lewis was in on her porn video?"

Eric: "There's a constant level of game play with reality stars, even in their day-to-day lives. Jenna had me convinced at times she had nothing to do with the distribution of the video but you can't deny that reality stars are good liars. I hope she made a profit from it. Otherwise, that just makes her dumb.

"We're going to cast the show in the next couple of weeks. Any porn star interested in competing should email me at emittlema@playboy.com. The show airs in July."

6/13/06