Adult Entertainment Expo 2007

Wednesday, January 10

McKayla McKayla McKayla Sophia Rossi Sophia Rossi Mika Tan Mika Tan Lexxi Tyler Jamie Elle Harmony Carmel Moore Carmel Moore Carmel Moore Aubrey Addams Aubrey Addams pic Stormy Samanthan Ryan Samantha Ryan Hillary Scott Hillary Scott Exotica, Hillary Scott Exotica, Hillary Scott Exotica, Hillary Scott Kurt Lockwood Superstar LFP's Memphis Monroe Joanna Angel Joanna Angel at LFP Joanna Angel Joanna Angel Joanna Angel Charlotte Stokely Charlotte Stokely Charlotte Stokely LFP girls LFP girls LFP girls LFP girls LFP girls LFP girls LFP girls LFP girls pic pic pic LFP girls LFP girls Joanna Angel, Joey Hart, Paris Dahl, Nikki Nine, Mya Luanna LFP girls LFP girls LFP girls LFP girls LFP girls DJ Batman and the LFP girls DJ Batman and the LFP girls Nikki Nine who?, Nikki Nine Kevin Beechum and a Hells Angel girl, Nikki Nine Kevin Beechum and a Hells Angel pic pic pic pic pic Brooke Haven Brooke Haven Brooke Haven pic pic pic pic pic pic Whitney Stevens Whitney Stevens Whitney Stevens Ashley Jensen Ashley Jensen Ashley Jensen Ashley Jensen Ashley Jensen Ashley Jensen Mia Rose Bill Margold Bill Margold JCs Girls and model (right) pic pic Sunny Lane at the Booble Babe booth Sunny Lane Sunny Lane Oren Cohen with Assraelis Ashley Blue Ashley Blue Micah Moore, Kevin Moore pic pic Tera Wray Tera Wray Tera Wray Luna Stern Robert Missoni (left), Michelle Ferrari Robert Missoni (left), Michelle Ferrari pic pic pic pic pic Nikki Coxxx Nikki Coxxx Jenna Jameson gangster Jenna Jameson Jenna Jameson Jenna Jameson Jenna Jameson Lanny Barby, girl Lanny Barby Lanny Barby Savannah Samson Savannah Samson Stephani Morgan Stephani Morgan Savannah Samson Savannah Samson Lanny Barby Nikki Nine Nikki Nine Nikki Nine Nikki Nine Exotica? Exotica? Exotica? Audrey Bitoni Audrey Bitoni Audrey Bitoni Audrey Bitoni pic pic Franchezca Valentina Franchezca Valentina Penthouse Pet Heather Vandeven Heather Vandeven pic pic Hailey Young Pat Collins and company Hailey Young Patrick Collins, Flower Tucci Patrick Collins, Flower Tucci John Douglas, Sunny Lane pic John Douglas, Sunny Lane Paulina James Paulina James

Thursday, January 11

Xeni Jardin, Memphis Monroe Xeni Jardin, Memphis Monroe Xeni Jardin, Memphis Monroe Memphis Monroe Bree Olson Bree Olson Jaime Elle Jamie Elle Vivid twins Lacey and Lyndsey Love Vivid twins Vivid twins Ashton Moore Ashton Moore Gina Lynn pic pic pic pic Adam, Michael, Mike, Rob Spallone, Leah Jeff Mullen, Scott David pic Mike South, Rachel (a stripper from Tampa Bay) pic pic pic pic pic Lori, Heather Veitch, Annie Mika Tan Mika Tan Mika Tan Vivid girls (L-R) Monique Alexander, Sunny Leone, Brea Lynn, Kayden Kross Vivid girls Vivid girls Vivid girls Vivid's Kayden Kross Vivid's Kayden Kross Vivid's Kayden Kross Dana De'Armond Dana De'Armond Dana De'Armond pic Randy West Sunset Thomas Sunset Thomas pic pic Ashton Moore Ashton Moore Ashton Moore pic pic pic pic pic pic pic Annell Julia Bond pic Caylian Curtis, girl? Caylian Curtis Caylian Curtis aka Kateriny Stankove from Czech Republic pic pic pic pic pic Julia Ann Julia Ann Julia Ann Nikki Nine Nikki Nine Roxy Jezel Roxy Jezel Flashman Flashman Mike South, Genesis model Heather Helmer Rob Spallone, Leah, Mike Barbella pic pic pic Christian, Rachel Lin Gordon, Rachel Lin Gordon, Rachel Lin Lexi Love Lexi Love pic Annie Cruz pic pic Robin Leach pic pic pic Jana Cova Jana Cova pic Marc Davis, Harmony pic pic Naughty America spokesmodel Van Styles, Drew Rosenfeld Sunny Leone Sunny Leone Sunny Leone Monique Alexander Monique Alexander McKayla? McKayla? pic Paulina James Paulina James Paulina James pic pic Tera Wray Tera Wray Tera Wray Tera Wray Sunny Lane Sunny Lane Sunny Lane Sunny Lane pic Claudia Antonelli Claudia Antonelli Claudia Antonelli Jana Cova, girl Jana Cova Jana Cova, girl Bree Olson Ashton Moore pic pic pic pic pic pic pic LFP girls Lorraine at Ninnworx pic pic pic pic Larry Flynt and company Larry Flynt and co Larry Flynt and co Nikki Nine Nikki Nine Jessica Drake pic Screech Sophie Dee, girls Sophie Dee and girls pic pic Summer Haze Anthony, Dion Giarusso pic pic Sophia Santi Jana Cova Jana Cova Jana Cova Jana Cova Shay Jordan Lacie Heart Ava Rose Sophia Rossi Sophia Rossi pic

Friday, January 12

Saturday Night's AVN Awards

Seka Seka pic pic Tony, owner of the BookTheBet.com Mary Carey Mary Carey Mary Carey and bodyguard Brianna Love, Stephanie Swift, girl Brianna Love, Stephanie Swift, girl Brianna Love, Stephanie Swift Nick Manning, Jessica Jaymes More photos XFanz

At this point my camera was confiscated by security because I did not have a press pass. In previous years, this did not matter.

Luckily, I had another camera in my pocket.

clip from West Coast Productions booth clip from Smash Pictures booth Summer Haze at Smash Pictures Summer Haze at Smash Pictures Summer Haze Smash Pictures Smash Pictures clip of Harmony clip clip clip clip Gina Lynn clip Gina Lynn Gina Lynn Gina Lynn Gina Lynn clip of Sunny Leone and company at the Vivid booth Vivid girls Vivid girls Vivid girls Vivid girls Vivid girls clip of Marc Davis, Harmony Nikki Nine Nikki Nine clip of Jenna Jameson and Jay Grdina at the Club Jenna booth clip clip of Mary Carey clip of Mary Carey clip clip Clip of Holly Randall, Renee, Celeste and company at the Pure Play booth Audrey Biton Audrey Biton Audrey Biton clip of Audrey Biton clip of Holly Randall at Pure Play Nikki Nine at the AVN Awards Amber Peach, Sunny Lane at the AVN Awards Amber Peach, Sunny Lane clip from the AVN Awards AVN Awards Gram Ponante reports

Email Luke photo IDs.

Scorpion writes: "Hey Luke, have you heard about the fight at the AEE opening night part? Apparently Tony Santoro of Black Ice/3rd Degree beat up Stuart Wall of Smash pictures. I'm curious as to why. I had no idea those two had beef."

Wednesday night, Tony Santoro (owner of Third Degree/Black Ice) was drunk. He got in Stuart Wall's face and accused him of saying that Third Degree sold their DVDs for $4 each. Then Tony knocked Stuart down and repeatedly kicked him.

The whole thing was caught on videotape by the club Tao who turned the evidence over to the police. A report was filed.

Apparently Tony Santoro also got in TT Boy's face about the same thing, questioning if he's saying things about their prices being sold on the market for $4-$5 per DVD yet you dont see Tony trying to throw down with TT BOY.

Friday morning, when I entered the Smash Pictures booth I noticed a bodyguard type of guy (Rudy) wearing a Third Degree shirt. He entered the booth to speak to Smash's lawyer to discuss some kind of settlement due to Stuart. Wall is filing a lawsuit against Santoro.

Travis Nestor from Third Degree/Black Ice emails:

Hey Luke, How you are doing? I just wanted to give you some information about the incident regarding Anthony Santoro and Stuart Wall from Smash Pictures. Yes, an altercation happened at the Tao Nightclub in Las Vegas. Mr. Wall was never kicked on the ground this can be verified by many witnesses who saw the altercation. The incident stems from Mr. Wall making unwanted sexual advances towards a female patron of the club then bragging about it to several other party goers (grabbing the ass of a female sales associate and friend of Mr. Santoro). Anthony Santoro has not been charged with any crime nor has been served any legal papers at this time. Your source is also incorrect by saying Mr. Santoro is the owner of both Third Degree Films and Black Ice. Anthony Santoro is the General Manager of Black Ice and does sell product for his friend Joey Wilson, the owner of Third Degree Films. Also the altercation happened Wednesday night and not Thursday as stated. There was also no incident involving TT Boy and Anthony Santoro. Thank you for making these corrections.

A source writes:

The girl whose ass was grabbed was a friend of Stuarts, Belle from New Sensations. There was zero discussion about this during the assault with Tony Santoro, this is the excuse being used since now he realizes that assaulting somebody in using violence is a criminal offense. The arguement stemmed from rumours on the 3rd Degree pricing being sold out there for $4-5.00. We'll see what happens once he's served papers.

Terry writes:

Luke, I was standing 3 feet from the altercation between Tony and Stuart and I can most definitely assure you that it was about the $4 dollar product Tony sells to everyone. He approached Stuart accusing him of spreading the news around town while hitting him with a cheap shot, which is ridiculous because I'm a retailer who does business with just about everyone in town and I can confirm that Tony not only sells Black Ice, Zero, and Third Degree for $4-$5 dollars but he also offers the "buy one get one free" deal often. This is effective when you need to get product on the shelf but it does and can flood the market. It's no secret that Tony, Greg and Joey sell their product cheap and give a ton away, but Santoro picking on a guy like Stuart makes them look even worse. Apparently Stuart has the casino tapes and many witness' so it will be interesting to see how this plays out.

I would also like to add that the AVN Awards were so bad that many are talking about not participating in AEE or the awards next year. The hot dogs and nacho's they offered everyone were insulting and the Criss Angel entertainment was worthy of a bad Vaudville review. This by far was the worst convention I have ever attended and I plan on doing most of my business at the Expo Mart. This was truly a sad state of affairs and many people are upset and disgusted with the whole event.

Chauncey Gardner emails: "Travis Nestor makes a valiant effort to defend his company but if he truly cared about their reputation he should be more careful and use more restraint when it comes to drugs. He ran around the show confused an strung out so Im not sure how he would be able to remember what really happened the night of the beating. Nice try, but if they can't handle the truth about their $4 dvd prices then they shouldn't be diluting the market with mediocre content."

Jenna Presley calls: "Something was said about Travis being all strung out. That wasn't the case. We went to Minxxx strip club. I was hosting a party there. Somebody put GHB in his drink. We were not on drugs. They put a lot of GHB in his drink and he was throwing up and doesn't remember anything. That's what happened. It wasn't purposely done."

Stuart Wall tells me Jan. 11 about Tony Santore: "He's known for doing this. He's done similar things in the past."

Luke: "Is he a black guy?"

Stuart: "He's an East Coast Italian guy."

Tuesday night in Las Vegas, Jan. 9, Emily Evermoore was having dinner with the Sex Z Pictures girls. She says they got catty with her and she ended up leaving. She says they were all friends with Mike Ramone and blamed her for him losing his job.

I'm told to investigate a story involving Bud Lee and Bo Kenney.

Ten times as many people que up for Jenna Jameson than for any other porn star.

Friday afternoon I run into Mary Carey. She seems under the influence of something, perhaps valium. She has two bodyguards, less to protect her from others than to protect her from herself.

Mary wants the crossover award. "I've done ten boy-girl scenes in three years. I've never swallowed cum and I market myself very well. I'm in the media constantly."

"I'm doing the Howard Stern show Jan. 31. Every time I do Howard Stern, I don't eat for a week, because Howard likes skinny girls."

Mary does a spontaneous rap about lukeisback.com and what a gangster I am.

Mary passes Wankus. He says hello. "Nice to meet you," Mary replies. He gives her a strange look.

"That's Wankus from KSEX," I say. "You know him."

Mary: "Oh boy, I'm going to hear about that."

On the way to a booth, Mary runs into Jessica Jaymes. They hug. The guards move Mary on.

"That's Jessica," wails Mary. "Jessica is my friend."

Heather Veitch says Gene Simmons was hitting on her. "I'm looking for a good girl," he said.

A camera from ABC TV's show Primetime follows Heather around Friday afternoon.

Veitch gets into a long discussion with a Satanist (Jane Bugbee) at the Extreme booth.

Jane says he was inducted into the Church of Satan by Anton LeVay.

The feud between the XXXChurch and JCsGirls is over. They used to give each other such fake greetings as, "The Lord is blessing us, I hope He's blessing you too."

Pastor Craig Gross and Heather Veitch had a long talk at the show.

Craig's former partner, Pastor Mike Foster, is now good friends with Heather and is redesigning the jcsgirls.com website.

The show is more mild since they stopped selling alcohol on the floor (about two years ago) and enforced strict rules on appropriate behavior -- no flashing, squirting, etc.... Back in 1999, girls would turn tricks in the back of booths.

Saturday night, Jan. 13, I ask Tony from BookTheBet.com if he worries about getting arrested. "No," he says. "I'm just a consultant."

Willie D writes on XPT: "Initally this morning, L-ke had a photo of Rob Spallone dressed in nothing but JoeBoxers. Nice touch of humor on DUC's part, but I imagine a single phone call to The Hovel had it removed ASAP."

Holly Randall posts: "Jenna looks so skinny it's scary. WTF is up with all these starving girls? It's incredibly unattractive, someone buy her a cheeseburger."

I think the DVD industry is dying. Could someone put together a photo montage from this year's show to the tune of "Nearer My God To Thee" ala this? I know it's Christian but I just love that song.

The most common thing I hear from journalists, including at this show: "Seriously, Luke, please don't write about me. I'm not that interesting."

Journalists know how dangerous journalists can be.

Monstar best deduced my mood at the show: "You want to cry out that Heart song, "What about love? Don't you want someone to care about you?""

Jan. 9. I leave my house at 8 a.m. for Rob Spallone's home. After messing around for a few hours, we finally leave at 11:30 a.m. with his 10-year old son Bob and his son's dog Karma as well as Mike Barbella (head of promotion for Elegant Angel) and Rob's girlfriend Leah (formerly Cameron Cain).

Rob rubs Karma's nether regions and announces with joy, "She's got the softest pussy!"

Mike says he spent time in prison for a 187 (murder).

Rob asks him not to smoke in front of his son.

At San Carlo's Deli, Rob yells at the owners for allowing cops in. Two undercover cops heard Rob blabbing about his shoot a few weeks ago. They phoned in the information and Rob's shoot got busted for not having a permit. Rob's received a year of probation.

Rob: "We were on our way to buy you a new car on Sunday and the horse fell down at the gate."

Mike: "You should try crack. It's the same high. When you come down after losing money, it's the same black hole feeling."

Rob: "I see you've tried it a few times."

Our road trip feels like Little Miss Sunshine. Rob's the little girl.

Mike: "Do you stop at the Mad Greek?"

Rob: "No."

Mike: "You don't do it right."

Barbella was supposed to ride with salesman Steve Volponi but when Steve saw Mike lighting up, he announced it was a non-smoking ride and kicked Barbella out.

Scorpion writes: "You should get Steve Volponi and Mike Barbella together in a room. No greater comedy exists I assure you."

Mike drove to Rob's house and parked in his driveway. You can only imagine Leah's delight when Mike banged on the front door and announced he was riding with them to Vegas.

Barbella has to start his Volvo with a screwdriver.

Mike won't fly out of fear of foot pollution. "Everybody has to walk together [through security] bare foot through a space two feet by eight feet. Mix together all those germs and you have created the most toxic foot fungus known to man."

Luke: "Will you have sex with a hooker?"

Mike: "No. Yes. I'll triple bag it."

Rob: "You're saying this in front of my 10-year old?"

Mike: "I'm teaching him proper etiquette."

Rob left Bob outside a CA betting place for two hours while he played the horses.

Mike: "If there's no money in porno, why is Greg at Anabolic driving three different Ferraris? The people who do it right have money."

Mike is four times as loud as Rob.

Luke: "Mike, how do you have so much energy?"

Rob: "He's a crack head."

Mike: "It's residual effects from the crack. It rewires your brain."

Barbella advises Bob: "Take your dad's dirty degenerate money and become a doctor or a lawyer."

Rob: "His college is paid for. Anywhere he wants to go. He got it when he was a baby."

Bob is tall for his age and slight. He's quiet and nothing like Rob.

Mike says that private schools in Los Angeles expell the children of pornographers as soon as they find out what their parents do for a living. "We don't want that type at our school."

We drop off Bob at his mom's home in Valencia.

During our drive to Vegas, it's "nigger this" and "nigger that."

I learn that basketball is "nigger golf."

Steve Alpani calls.

Rob: "I'm going to kill you."

"What's a nigger car? A Lincoln."

Mike: "Mafia? There ain't no Mafia. Perhaps a Jewish Mafia? Israelis run the industry. We're living on the Gaza strip."

A car goes by with two black people. Mike and Rob go crazy.

Luke: "There don't seem to be many people of color in Valencia."

Mike: "Here he goes with the bait. It's translucent."

Rob: "Mike, you should move out. There are a lot of meth labs out here."

I ask Rob: "Have you ever shot interspecies erotica?"

Rob: "You mean with a nigger and a white girl?"

Rob speculates that his oldest boy is ripping girls apart.

Proud papa.

Mike: "No matter what, I will always survive. I will always be happy. I will always have my feet on the ground and my head in the sky..."

Rob: "And a crack pipe in your mouth."

Mike: "If I don't write $500,000 worth of business at the show, I'm going to fire myself."

It takes about half an hour for Barbella and company to figure out the GPS navigation system.

Every time we pass black people on the road, my merry band of white supremacists (every group thinks it is supreme, so no big deal so long as you don't harm others) smiles and laughs.

Mike Barbella says Gene Ross's website Adultfyi.com has an Alexa ranking of 3,000. I say that my Alexa is about 22,000 (that means there are about 22,000 websites with more traffic than mine) and it is ahead of Gene's [48,700]. Mike disagrees. Rob takes my side. Rob bets his new black Mercedes vs. Barbella's Volvo on lukeisback.com vs. Adultfyi.com.

Mike calls Gene Ross and gets an answer machine.

Mike: "I'm going to call Fat Anthony [Tony Malice] at JM."

Anthony confirms that I have a better Alexa ranking.

Mike screams in frustration. He yells that I've made many mistakes.

We reminisce about the time Rob's brother Roy visited John Bone to collect money for a porn girl. John pulled a gun on him. "You better shoot me right now," said Roy, according to this story.

Rob says John ended up calling the cops.

Along the 215 highway east, Mike says: "I went to rehab there, Warm Springs."

Rob: "You should've gone there twice."

Mike plugs in his Sirius radio and we listen to Howard's interview with Jenna. He asks how she lost the weight. She said she was on a lot of hormones to get pregnant and then gave up the idea and lost the weight.

Jenna's super-sensitive about her weight.

After Dominic aka Dr. X served as her roadie, Jenna ripped him apart (including in her book). Asked for a response, Dr. X joked, "She's fat."

Jenna became furious and her husband Jay Grdina threatened Dominic's life.

The first porn event I ever attended was the 1996 FOXE Awards when Gene Ross got it on with Kim Chambers in the press room.

Steve Ornstein's sister Renee did publicity for numerous porn companies.

I walk two miles to Mandalay Bay and back Saturday night in freezing temperatures to save on cab fare.

I should've carried a cross on my shoulders and called on sinners to repent.

When John Douglas did an interview at the Extreme Associates booth, he ate a satanic wafer. He reports that it tasted bland, like rice cakes.

"I'm the last bridge that everybody burns on their way out of the industry," says Douglas.

I met him and his partner Dave Michaels on the AVN Awards red carpet in January 1999. It was the beginning of a long and beautiful friendship.

We check in at 5:25 p.m. to Green Valley Resort, 20-minutes outside of the Strip in Henderson.

Rob yells: "What's Dick Nasty's real last name?"

The CES conventioneers exchange smiles with the clerks.

Rob gets a luxury suite for $1100 a night. He's going to get comped because he bets so much.

The suite has a pool table.

"You think this is nice?" says Rob. "I stayed in a suite with its own swimming pool."

I sleep on the couch.

I tip the doorman $5. The next day, Leah gives me $20 to play the slots. I win $5:83. I don't spend a penny in Las Vegas. Whenever it is time to leave a tip or pay a bill, I disappear.

I let everyone know that I am allergic to spending money (that I don't have).

If I had money, I'd pay my share.

I stay Saturday night with Houston Don and get a ride home with Las Vegas. Not only do I not contribute my share, I don't contribute a penny.

I leave Vegas with more money than I came with. Thanks Rob, Don, and John.

I view my writing as a public service. Instead of trying to monetize my work, I happily concentrate on the things I do best and then put my hand out for charity.

Rob says that hotel windows in Vegas don't open out so people can't jump after losing their money.

On his first night, Rob wins $15,000. Then, over the next four nights, he loses $18,000.

No Toyota Camry for me.

I chat with Nikki Nine. She turned 18 in June of 2006 and entered porn in October.

I ask Rob Spallone how much he weighs. He says, "205 pounds."

"You carry it well," I reply.

"Are you being facetious?"

"Rob, that's a big word."

Rob's son Joe, a basketball player, berates Rob for being short.

"You shouldn't be mad at me for being short," Rob replies. "You should be mad at me for being white."

Wednesday morning. Show floor. Stormy says to me, "How come every time I see you, you look younger?"

Luke: "Because I'm always helping people..."

Stormy: "I'm not buying it. I think it's botox."

I chat with Brooke Haven. She's now a brunette. "New girl, new teeth, new hair," she says. "If I was your girlfriend, do you think you'd cheat?"

I try to get pictures of Monique Alexander but I've forgotten her name. So when in doubt in this situation, follow my advice and just yell "Lexi!"

Monique stares at me. "You called me Lexi? I look nothing like Lexi."

I keep running into people I don't want to run into.

As I walk past Ange Venus in a bikini, I overhear a woman say, "Is it OK to stare?"

Thursday night, there's a ferocious wind outside. Rob says, "I think the Arabs have something to do with this."

Rob yells at Ed Kail: "You lost. You're the nigger in the room."

So Ed racks the balls.

Leah gets up and heads to the bedroom.

"Where you going?" Rob asks.

"Nunya," she says, as in, "None of your business."

Rob asks me: "If you had a choice between being a nigger and a gay guy, what would you be?"

Luke: "I'd kill myself."

"Right answer," Rob says.

Saturday night, I sit next to Sunny Lane's parents (and two camera people from ABC's Primetime show) at the AVN Awards.

Thank you Sunny for the ticket.

"Sunny just french-kissed Dave Navarro!" says Sunny's mom.

Mom has Sunny's ebullient personality. The dad is quiet.

"That's our movie!" Sunny's mom yells a couple of times when movies her daughter starred in get awards.

The cameraman next to me uses his cell phone to get some light on Mrs. Lane's face so he can get some video footage.

April Storm got bit by a spider just before the show so Mrs. Lane took over her job.

Except for the stand-up comic Bobby Slayton hosting the show, all the presenters read from a teleprompter. About half of the crowd can read the thing before the presenters get around to their lame lines.

Guys around me start chanting from the prompter and mocking the porn girls mangling their lines.

Scott Taylor runs on stage to grab the mike and take Amy Ried's award while she's making her way up.

Everything Jessica Drake says is from the teleprompter, including, "What a great clip."

Sophia Rossi can either not read the teleprompter or has an impossible time pronouncing her lines.

Chuck Ortiz is pointed out. He's sitting next to his girlfriend Jenna Jameson. A heckler behind me yells out, "Chuck Liddell!"

Chuck thrashed Tito in a fight a few weeks ago.

"Tito's gay!" yells the heckler.

The host Bobby Slayton rejoins: "I'd like to see you say that to his face."

For the rest of the night, I hear chants that Tito is gay.

When Brad Armstrong wins a Best Director award, he kisses Slayton full on the lips.

"Pornography: The Secret History of Civilization" wins an award for Best DVD even though it came out in 2000.

Mika Tan wins "underrated starlet" award "for unrecognized excellence."

Jewel DeNyle's dad Larry Schwartz has a shocking dye job.

Crystal Clear was in prison for seven years because she tried to kill her sister.

You can't blame Crystal. She'd stolen cigarettes from her father and her sister told on her.

Crystal was 12.

Mike Kovacs has left Leisure Time (where he was general manager for about 15 years) and he's now at Red Light District's new mail-order company.

Rob Spallone says the show seems less crowded because so many people are smoking crystal meth that they take up less space.

Dinner. Thursday. Restaurant. Rob yells out, "I didn't say nigger, you little Jew!"

Rob walked into Nordstroms the other day and asked for the most expensive handbang they had. He bought it for $600.

He's proud that his girlfriend has never had to work during the three years they've been together.

Over breakfast, I tell Adam, a secular Jew who runs X-Cartel, that thousands of his ancestors died rather than eat bacon.

I tell him that thousands of his ancestors died rather than wear the cross (which Adam used to do).

After Adam, who tells me he's not a Zionist, tells me about an all-male lead movie he wrote for Rob, I tell him that thousands of his ancestors died rather than commit sodomy.

Adam and I hit it off so well that Rob and Ed Kail become convinced that we're in love.

Before photographing Mike South with Heather Helmer, I say, "Pull the stomach in, Mike."

Helmetcam Man Gary Gray is engaged to the producer of the former Helmetcam Man show.

Lorraine emails:

I usually don't email you, but I was surprised that nobody else voiced complaints about the AVN Awards Show this year. I thought it was a disappointing event ( with exception of the outstanding performance of John Stagliano's Fashionistas show and Larry Flynt's moving speech ).

A lot of the nominees couldn't do the red carpet, because it was closed down two thirds through - I presume because the show needed to start. The officials made it crystal clear that only nominees could walk the carpet to begin with ( as opposed to last year ). Problem was that entire groups like the Digital Playground girls and the Vivid girls were led to the front of the line and then consumed a lot of time being photographed and interviewed, ultimately preventing many nominees from being able to walk the red carpet. Same goes for non-nominee Gene Simmons and his group. I thought the organization and execution of that truly lacked competence next to respect and at least the facade of equality for all nominees. I suggest for next year AVN should have a specific schedule for the red carpet to give companies and nominees the appropriate time needed.

The award for "Best Director - Film" was read off the screen, which I thought was very disrespectful, however the award for "Best Ethnic Themed Release - Latin" or "Best Ethnic Themed Series - Latin" ( I forgot which ) was given to the winner on stage and he was given the opportunity to make an acceptance speech.

I also heard of complications for performers who had seats up in the ranks among the fans and weren't allowed to go down onto the floor, even if they were nominees and in at least one instance, won an award. Principally, I think all nominees should be seated on the floor and there should be a 'performers only' section in the ranks for non-nominees.

In closing, the event wasn't as personal as in the past. No food was offered, no company signs identified the tables and the atmosphere was more resemblant of a public lynching than of an industry celebration, which it should have been.

Keiko/Rob Longshot Rumors

Rob blogs:

1. Is keiko dead? - well now that is one of those interesting questions that has multiple answers. The girl who played Keiko is very much alive and laying here next to me while I type this. Keiko herself (the character) is no more... see my wife outgrew the persona of Keiko for many reasons, the first being that the name was stupid and got mangled constantly and was very odd considering that in reality she has not a lick of Japanese in her blood. and secondly because she got pigeonholed into the Alt/goth genre through no real decision of her own.. she and I were both always uncomfortable with our place in that whole world... yes, we like the music, but it is not how we choose to define ourselves... but we kept on being pushed to carry it further.

2.Will the girl formerly known as Keiko return to porn? That is not for me to answer... but i can assure you that if/when she does she will be barely recognizable from her previous incarnation.

3. just answer me this, Did she get fake tits? Well... she doesnt put them on the nightstand before bed., but she does have 34DD's now... but they are real... real expensive. (and really hot)

4. What about Italy? Well.... we never really had a 100% plan to go, it was based on my citizenship status and that is up in the air for a while. Not to mention the political climate in Europe is less than favorable at the moment, we do plan on visiting Japan this year though!

Rob blogs:

I figure i will take this opportunity to address a few rumours.

1.Are you bisexual? -No, not that i find anything wrong with that in any way... but it is not for me. I am only attracted to women, sorry. This all started because of something i posted on XXXporntalk one night while drunk and strung out on Klonopin... that shit will do ya in. BTW i have since quit all such substances... more on that later. anyway, i ran with the joke for a few weeks cause it was funny... but i posted later saying it was a joke. and no, i do not have a crush on Wankus... LOL, soory man, hes my friend, but if i was gay i would hope i would be able to do a little better... i mean come on.

2. Why did you REALLY go back to florida? -Well i was pretty f---ed up. I had been working for a total douchebag for a year and he had kinda sapped all the life out of me and helped turn me into a person nearly as bitter and sad as he is ( HI JOE!). anyway, i was also HEAVILY addicted to Anti-anxiety medications and alcohol and was slowly but quickly killing myself. Not to mention the addiction of loved ones, so, i returned to florida due to some family problems here and took the opportunity to clean my shit up. I am now sober, no longer such a gloomy gus, and have my shit on track... wich brings me to question 3.

3. Are you ever returning to porn? - You know, when i left LA i really wanst sure... part of me thought i was coming here to die. I originally planned that if i did return i would kill off the Rob Longshot charachter much as my wife was going to kill off Keiko, and has. Well, due to the imploring of my friends not to change my name to Rob Rocket... and the level of comfort i had grown to have with this name, i sort of injected the new persona into the old name... hence the upgrade.

4. Why blond? - can you think of any better way to immidiately dissasociate myself with my past persona? I think not!

5. Didnt you hate porn? -f--- NO!!! I have always been one of this industry's biggest cheerleaders!!!! That may have been assumed because i said some things directed at a small number of individuals.... LOOK! porn is like a family to me, even more so than my real one at times. But, like all families, your not always proud of all its memebrs actions all the time...

6. are you still fat? -do l look like im still fat motherf---er? I have some weight to lose still but i am down to 164 and happy... i should be at what i was at when i was a martial arts competitor by the time i return to the valley...

7. when are you coming back? -hrmmmm that one is for you all to find out when it happens!

8. Are you racist? anti-semetic? - hell f---ing no. i make jokes, im a big believer in politically incorrect humour because i believes that it helps tear down barriers and bring us closer to unity. I am a futurist and a utopianist, I feel it will take all of humanity working towards a better future to bring us to where we need to be, beyond the bondaries of race, religion, etc.

9. Are you a satanist? - maybe at one point in my life i would have answered this differently, but NO. I am not a negative person and i do not believe in selfish philosophies. I have evolved beyond that point of my life.

Rob blogs:

ok, this should be the last set.... 1.the Eon McKai thing..... let me be up front, to be honest the whore formerly known as Keiko and I have nothing against Eon, Joanna, Malachai... any of those people.. it all just got out of hand... allow me to explain a bit. See, post Art School K was promoting the hell out of Eon and the movie and sorta became an "alt" poster girl... well... at the same time my boss was telling me to do something similar, but i couldnt do it till I made a stink and i couldnt be supporting someone else product. To be honest, i really didn't want to shoot a goth movie... i like some fetishy stuff or some varied fasions, but i want to make movies that will stand the test of time.... but, money is a master, and i did it, i dragged her into it with me even though she wanted nothing more than to break out of that genre... I apologized to Eon later. I would hope all is now smoothed out, and in the end it workd out as good promotion for him. It's just not my thing, I like raw sex, and i like pornotypical images... im a big fan of 80's porn... gimme big tits and big blonde hair anyday.

2. did you and the girl formerly known as "keiko' ever really break up... nope, it was a work.

LFP Drew Rosenfeld's Rocker Glory?

Unknown writes:

If you go to a popular music parody site called METAL SLUDGE, there are some hilarious pics of him from the mid-80's and early 90's.

Also, there is an interview with a former band member and childhood friend that was in the band with Drew.

Dana DeArmond Homeless

She posts Jan. 15 on MySpace:

i left LA tuesday for las vegas. friday my house caught fire. the neighbor across the hall had left a candle burning in a plastic cup. i have lost literally everything. the walls, roof and all contents of my house are completely destroyed. the only things i own were in my suitcase i took to vegas. (a few short skirts and stripper shoes mostly) i lost some very expensive things i need for my work 24" iMac, 2 external harddrives. and i also lost things i needed for everyday. sneakers, tshirts, underwear, towels, sheets, my bed. etc. literally everything is gone. i went to the house and filmed today. hopefully we will have something edited and up on the net soon so you can see exactly how tragic this situation is. i am very lucky to be alive and to have the support of my peers, friends, family and fans. i am asking if there is anything you can donate there are over 300,000 of you and one of me. my boyfriend daniel (kakihara on my top8) has also lost everything. is there anything you can send to help us get our lives back together?

Notes from 2007 AEE

Derek117 posts on ADT:

My notes, in no particular order:

1. The Blonde to Brunette Craze Continues. Stefani Morgan, as a brunette, looks incredibly hot and like mainstream star, Jessica Biel. BTW, Nicole Sheridan who I though had retired, was at AEE as a brunette, too.

2. Monique Alexander is the most normal pornstar on earth. To bad she didn't win any awards. She would be a great spokeswoman for the industry. She also had the most attractive, normal looking date/boyfriend? of all the female talent. (see below)

3. Stars Most Missed, who I wanted to talk with: Teagan Presley & Janine.

4. Star I Made Sure I Missed/Avoided: Mary Carey

5. Awards I Most Agreed With: Naomi, Best New Starlet, Stormy, Best Contract Star, and "Island Fever 4" girl/girl scene.

6. Award I Totally Didn't Understand: Vivid getting a Gonzo Award.

7. Sign that the Industry is Still in Need of Major New Star to cross market and bring in new customers: Jenna Jameson (again) getting the Cross Over award. Meaning that after all these years she is still the Most Recognized Porn Star in the biz.

8. Corporate Strategy for 2006 that Backfired: Vivid going "harder" with more anals, condoms optional, rougher sex, and (upcoming) more IR. They won fewer awards as a result of these changes than in past years, when they focused on their core market.

9. Lacie Heart, signing for new company, Digital Playground, looks great IN CLOTHES. Maybe better than nude...um, this could be a problem.

10. Male Talent & Boyfriends of PornBabes: with the exception of Jean Valjean, these are the meanest looking collection of guys this side of a Hells Angels knife fight. I guess this is why Jenna Jameson dissed the male talent recently in the mainstream press. Then, again, she was with Tito Ortiz.

11. CES Note: This event was totally over-shadowed by MacWorld in San Francisco, and the announcement of the iPhone. Like other people I know, I went to MacWorld first then made the jump to Vegas.

I Want To Add Video Clips To Lukeisback

What would be the best and cheapest and smallest video camera (with sound) to take along to sets and parties? Particularly something good at night. How can I do this on the cheap? I think I could snag some sponsors (perhaps Vivid or AVN?) for a 5-10 second commercial at the beginning of each clip to pay for the bandwidth.

Kira Kener Update

I talk to Kira on the phone Jan. 15.

She's opening a new website kirakenerlive.com.

Her Wikipedia entry.

Kira wanted to correct me on some things I'd posted about her.

Kira: "I have never escorted and I never will."

"That was absolutely ugly what was put on there..."

"It's funny how you'll post anything but you won't check the facts. Some things you check the facts on...but that was blatantly rude and it's pretty slanderous. Considering how somebody tried to use that against me... You don't even realize the damage you've caused."

"Did you even bother to watch the [Vivid reality] show?"

Luke: "No."

Kira: "I have a copy of it. Savannah Samson did come to my rescue. To say all the Vivid girls hated me, you're wrong. Cheyenne Silver called me not long ago..."

Luke: "Some of the girls disliked you?"

Kira: "Of course. Why do you think Brianna Banks hated me?"

Luke: "I don't know."

Kira: "Because she dated Bobby Vitale right after me. Bobby doesn't say the nicest things about people when he's done dating 'em, especially when he's been kicked out of their house. It even said on the reality show that Brianna dated Kira's ex, when she was sitting there making horrible statements..."

Vivid terminated Kira's contract in February 2004.

Kira: "I did ask out of my contract because they were going in a direction I didn't want to go in."

Luke: "Have you made any adult movies since then?"

Kira: "I'm not going to answer that one yet."

"I really hated that comment about hating the fans. I've got so many pictures with my fans. The people who read what you wrote said it was such BS. I've always placed bets with my fans -- if I don't remember something about you, I'll give you something free. That's how I became famous with my fans. That's why my fans loved me and I had the following I did."

Luke: "What did you love and hate about your time in the Adult industry?"

Kira: "I liked doing the movies. I liked the sex. That was my sex life. Things I hated, you're supposed to become a yes person. I don't like being forced into doing things I don't want to do. The biggest thing I hated was people talking about me. They dubbed me 'the bitch of porn.' The reasons that they did that -- I'm ok with because for me to refuse to work without my test, I'm ok with that.

"There have been several occasions... When you're used to working with certain production managers and then they switch out and you work with a new one, and you're used to working with the old one, the new one doesn't know what the old one does. For instance, the old one picked up your test. The newer production manager didn't know that and yes, I shut the set down because I wasn't going to work without my test.

"There were times when I was told, 'I saw your test.' Someone is going to be there at 11 p.m. and they saw my test? Come on. I'm not going to take someone's verbal answer unless it came from AIM."

Luke: "Do you think the industry was doing everything it could to keep people healthy?"

Kira: "No."

Luke: "How often were you pushed to do things you didn't want to do?"

Kira: "In all fairness, producers and directors are supposed to get all they can out of you, but the only thing that comes to mind that just pisses me off was trying to get me to work without my test. At one time I was asked, 'Do you really think you have something?' I said, 'What? Because I have a Vivid girl label, I'm immune to everything?'"

Paperchase emails:

A small point, but defamation that occurs through the written word, such as allegedly happened on your site would be considered libelous not slanderous. Slander refers to the spoken, not the printed word. The distinction is most important in regards to what damages can be awarded.

Incidently when someone threatens to sue you for "Slander" this is usually a pretty good indication they have not talked to a lawyer, yet.

What's Going On With Jesse Jane?

Is she OK?

Jack writes about Tory Lane: "She was extremely drunk / hungover most of the time, she skipped out on Friday all together, and only spent 45 minutes at the JJV booth on Saturday."

Awards For 2006

Inspired by AVN, I'd like to give out my own awards for 2006, but I want them to be funny. I'm too lazy to think of anything, but maybe you have some ideas? Email Luke

Leslie writes:

In the wake of Nikki Nova and Asia Carrera...maybe you could have a "biggest supposely rich porn star begger" award like Dana DeArmond right now?

Reading Holly's post just though you should have a "give her a sandwhich award" :-).It's obvious Jenna is a contender this year and I think I read somewhere Jesse Jane was also in need for a sandwich but...even though I haven't seen a picture of her lately, Nina Hartley was certainly skinny as hell the last picture I've seen of her.Could be contender too.

Another funny award could be "the biggest on/off on/off on/off pornstar/boyfriend relationship" Contenders would be Mary Carey,Aurora Snow.

Another award (not really funny though):"the most prestigious video...that never came" Janine loves Jenna.

Shy Love's Legal Drama

Madness writes Jan. 9:

Luke, Sorry to hear about your subpoena. What a great way to start the New Year, huh? From what I hear, you'll be having plenty of company. Shy�s basically going to end up having virtually everyone in porn subpoenaed, either as a witness for her fraud case or her countersuit. In her deposition yesterday, Shy named at least 7 Hustler employees including Drew Rosenfield., as potential witnesses.

My understanding is that she specifically names Drew as a person who encouraged her to break off her business ties to her former partner in Viscous Media. I also hear that during the deposition she named some heavyweight mainstream ad execs, including people tied to Howard Stern. Can�t way to see a transcript of the deposition � I hear it is possibly the funniest depositions every transcribed by a court reporter. At one point Shy claimed not to know what year she graduated from high school or when she attended college.

Just for Shy�s edification, the way to solve that complex word problem is to take her age at the time she graduated, and add that number to the year she was born. That should provide you with the year she graduated, give or take a year depending on her birthday and how many grades she failed. One would have figured that someone who claims to have graduate degrees in both accounting and taxation would have been able to figure that out � of course, one would have figured that someone with graduate degrees in accounting and taxation wouldn�t be making her living getting f---ed in the ass.

Jewel DeNyle On Her Parents

Jewel writes on ADT:

I wouldn't want to catch anything she's got. I'm happy doing what I'm doing and I don't think it's fair for you guys to rag on me. I worked hard for my name and don't need anyone riding my coat tails. As for my parents their actions speak louder then words. I hope you all have someone you love one day do what my parents have done to me. I have no regrets with my choices and I have every right to protect my name against companies using it for their own gain. Better yet if you have daughters I hope they do something to rip your souls in half then maybe you'd understand.

I agree my mom has her own name I don't think companies need to use mine to promote it. She can do what she wants but for people coming down on me isn't right when they only know a thrid of the truth behind everything. One day I'll write a book then maybe it will clear the air. For instance my mom is in the hospital not doing well and my dad's in Vegas with some 19yr old chick. What a great family they really stand by each other????????? Maybe this will give you a sense of loyalty my parents have.

She's not doing well after surgery got a major infection and my dad runs off to AVN with some other girl nice of him isn't it??? Maybe if you all knew how my parents really are instead of the BS they front then you'd see how pathetic they really are. I blame him for most everything that's gone wrong between my mother and I as he brainwashed her and turned her into a puppet. Running off with a 19yr old to vegas just proves it when she lays in the hospital.

If she left him I'd forgive her for everything as he is manipulative and controlling and has done nothing but harm to our family. He's whored her out for money and pushed her into doing porn because he lost everything all his retirement etc... So he is using her and I can tell she's putting on a front and isn't happy with her life.

A buyer's observations of AEE

Jack writes:

Hello Luke, I am a new buyer for a major adult retailer. I attended AEE for the first time last week. Here are a few observations: The average height of a male porn star seems to be about 5"3 apparently. T.T. Boy looked like a disgruntled bus boy. Years of fake tanning results in your favorite porn star having a dried baked potato glow in person. Jenna Jameson and the Geico lizzard were never seen in the same room at the same time... The only difference between a video company sales manager and a carnival worker is a carnival worker has more teeth. Is there such thing as a cold sore on a butt cheek?

Porn studios raided to ensure adult-only casts

According to the LA Times: "The FBI seeks records to make sure minors haven't been hired. The industry and public policy experts question the probes' effectiveness."

This is nonsense. The 2257 regulations are not about preventing child pornography. They are about limiting adult pornography producers to the small number who can handle the paperwork requirement. A limited number of porn producers are then easier to smash.

The AVN Awards: Too Open to the Public

Attorney Michael Fattorosi blogs:

...The AVN Awards has been compared to the Academy Awards, however, they separate the �stars� from any fan that might be lucky enough to attend. Alcohol was freely available to all in attendance and drunk fans mingling with pornstars as hardcore porn is being shown on video screens usually doesn�t lead to good results. From my experience of having performers sign at my booth at various expos, some fans are already too �grabby� for most female performers and I always provide security in case something gets out of hand. With the Awards, there was no separation between the fans and the performers. Why an area specially designated for performers to sit in and be segregated from the fans was not pre-planned is some what of a mystery. This could have made the event much more comfortable for the performers I talked to. Only the floor seats were segregated.

Even Mandalay Bay must be questioned as to their preparation for the event. There were no barriers along the route through the hotel to the Awards Show and very little security along the way. It was almost impossible to safely walk through the hotel. At least at the Venetian, the walk to the event was well guarded and blocked off. At the Mandalay Bay, during the walk we were stopped on several occasions by fans reaching out and grabbing my date�s arm for picture opportunities.

I know you are thinking - what an ass you are Michael, fans deserve the right to interact with their favorite stars. Granted I agree but it needs to be done in a way that the performers feel safe or simply they will not attend next year. While I have not heard of any incidents of any fan becoming too friendly at this year�s show I can tell you that numerous performers I talked to did seem disappointed in how they were treated at the show.

Kris Roc posts on XPT: "I was at the Mandalay Bay and it was a mad house. It seemed like a free-for-all with the girls (names withheld) running and evading their "fans." How rude...lol... Oh! One person that's worth mentioning was Amy Ried. She was walking with another girl and she bumped into a guy and spilled her drink on him and herself and had to nerve to tell him to Watch where the f-ck you are going! Unbelievable."

Zenman posts: "The whores think they're in show biz. As such, they think of themselves as a 'gift' to their fans, not just the shiftless irresponsible semen holes they really are."

King posts: "All the more reason for the uppity ho's to experience the gag factor treatment. Reorientation. Would have been sweet if that guy had this pic in his wallet to show her as a reminder of what she does for a living."

Jack writes: "She did seem to have that stuck-up cunt complex. It's a shame, too, I guess that kind of beauty goes to your head after a while (porn whore or not). I had printwork to give her, and just happened to run into her while leaving on Friday or Saturday. Quite honestly, I don't even recall if she thanked me for it. I could give a f--- less, really, as I just wanted to get it off my hands. But the gesture would have been nice. Regardless, she's still a piece of ass."

Michael Fattorosi posts: "I know of one well known performer that was harrassed by a fan, ended up bloody and crying after the show in the middle of the hotel. Thats not about being a "star" - no one deserves that."

Tricia Devereaux posts on ADT:

>Star I Made Sure I Missed/Avoided: Mary Carey... Unfortunately, I wasn't able to avoid her. But I did have the pleasure of kicking her sorry ass out of my booth as she was attempting to tell me that she's a bigger star than Belladonna. Bigger freak show, I'll give her.

Consumer Alert: Covered Nipples

Attorney Michael Fattorosi blogs:

What you can take off when you strip, and do once you�re naked, depends on where you live.

Last week, the Missouri Supreme Court unanimously struck down a law banning full nudity in strip clubs. At the same time, Alabama�s law�requiring that nipples, lower breast, and buttocks be covered�was reaffirmed.

Does that mean that Missouri�s strippers are less dangerous than Alabama�s? Or that men in Missouri are better at resisting these she-devils?

Homegrown Video Crew Wearing Smiles At Convention

If looks are accurate, they are on their way to a big win in their dispute with Ron Levi and Cybererotica. Expect an announcement in February.

I understand Ron Levi is back in CE's office every day running the show. I don't think he's too happy about what's happened to the company while he was gone.

Mike Barbella Found

Rob Spallone calls Tuesday at 6 p.m. "The top of your page -- Mike Barbella missing in action. He left here last night to go see his son. Nobody's seen him since. He didn't show up for work. No phones, no nothing. This isn't like him."

Steve Volponi from Devil's Film emails: "I, my wife and Tianna Lynn just combed the valley from Sherman Oaks to what we believe is the area Mike lives in looking for him and/or the Volvo/$7k Stereo as Mike refers to it. We even went to the Albertson's market in reseda where Mike is known to shop. We were unsuccessful in locating Barbella."

Jan. 17. Steve updates: "Much like the elusive Yetti, Barbella has surfaced. He phoned Patrick Collins saying he literally slept for 24 Hours and wasn't truly sorry."

What Happened To Bo Kenney At The Show?

LGI Bo... I heard he got arrested for drugs at the AEE.