Tuesday, May 3, 2005
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Apr 28 Air
Supply Forever
Lights,
Camera And Plenty Of Action At Sex Worker Film Festival
San Francisco (Wireless Flash) - A film festival takes place Friday
(May 6) and Saturday (May 7) in San Francisco and it will offer lights,
camera and plenty of action.
It's the 4th Sex Worker Film Festival and includes 50 films written
by and about sex workers.
Organizer Carol Leigh says the entries include a documentary about
Xaviera Hollander's childhood in a concentration camp before she became
the Happy Hooker and a film that focuses on black women who do whatever
they can to get a piece of the American dream - whether it be selling
drugs, sex or bootleg CDs.
Is the Playboy game for Xbox any good?
Sarah Webinc writes on GFY: "I just got an xbox and looking to get
some games but fairly clueless. I like the simulation type games and I
was looking at the Playboy one for the PC but thought I might aswell get
it for the xbox. So, any good?"
The
reviews say no: "This Sims-style strategy game comes off as cold
and mechanical, capturing none of the devil-may-care attitude you'd expect
and casting Hef's idyllic lifestyle as a hollow grind."
Cindy
Crawford Leaves JKP
There's a lot more trouble ahead for
JKP. Their only contract girls are Nikki Benz and Tyra Banxxx.
JKP stock jumped 50% to 45c and then dropped 25c to 20c a share. It was
the first time it had traded since April 28.
HoustonDon
writes: "As a long time investor in the stock market, I doubt
very much that losing Cindy was the reason behind JKP's stock increasing.
It more likely had to do with the recent management shakeup or one of
those few big shareholders in the company manipulating the stock price."
Gram
Ponante On Bitches In Heat 2
I remember when my cat was in heat, she would make the most horrible
yowling sounds and do everything she could to back into my elbow. It
disgusted me then, but now I've matured and will not try to suppress
anyone's sexuality.
Colossal's Bitches in Heat 2 is a gonzo film, so I don't know how the
characters are developed to telegraph that these women are actually
"bitches" and how they are "in heat," but I will support them in their
self expression.
Gram Ponante
On Lauren Phoenix
I won't describe the sex because it makes me feel dirty and wrong.
But there is a reason Lauren Phoenix has won all those awards and has
a city in Arizona named after her.
XBiz Introduces
Gram Ponante's Porn Valley Observed Blog
(LOS ANGELES, CA) -- Recognizing the importance of spotlighting talent
and production-related news within the adult entertainment industry,
XBiz.com has officially launched Gram
Ponante's Porn Valley Observed blog.
An exciting addition to the XBiz.com business portal for industry professionals,
Gram Ponante's blog is not
only a point of reference and a bridge between the online and offline
sectors of the industry, but also a source of entertainment for XBiz
readers.
Gram Ponante's blog seeks to expose the lighter side of the business
with thoughtful irreverence, humor and a little bit of sarcasm and will
regularly feature insider news, production reviews, party coverage,
interviews, gossip, commentary and personal insight into the adult industry.
"I'll leave the mudslinging and muckraking to other people," Ponante
told XBiz. "Porn is supposed to be fun."
XBiz invites readers to follow the daily entries of Gram Ponante at:
GramBlog.XBiz.com. For more information contact Editors@XBiz.com
Producing Porn Movies - A Good Investment?
Terri Redor from TheFloatingWorld.com
replies to an inquiry:
Getting into the production business requires more than intelligence,
money and camera experience - it requires connections. Once you've put
all of your money and time into what you think is a good production,
you still need marketing, distribution, sales, etc. I would recommend
hooking up with someone higher-up to start with. I don't have those
kinds of connections. At least that way you could shoot a couple of
scenes, send the results, and see what someone with marketing experience
thinks.
You might also think about hooking up with one of the hungry new distributors,
like Old Pueblo, but even then they are looking for a finished product.
I'd recommend sending your film student out to LA to work as a cameraman
on a set with someone you know, just to get a feel for a real production.
I'll bet Luke will just warn everyone away from the business altogether,
for reasons touching on the human soul. I would warn them away for business
reasons. It's a real business - would you recommend someone jump into
the mortgage banking business with their life's savings, with no experience
with federal banking requirements, real estate or bankruptcy laws?
The only people I've heard of making making producing videos are those
who have a background in the industry, usually in sales and marketing.
Chris Steele's malicious harassment?
Damon Kruezer, Gay Entertainment
Writer-Reviewer as well as Casting and Creative Consultant (EMALE: damon@damonkruezer.com),
writes:
Dear Friends, Fans and Colleagues:
Some of you are aware of a renegade website set up for the sole purpose
of harassing and defaming me through impersonation. Most of you are
aware of how my investigative reporting about the many problems with
Falcon Lifetime Exclusive Matthew Rush's website led to Michael Musto
of the Village Voice writing about me and my reporting on March 21st
(see attached for details). Now Falcon has admitted that there was a
problem due to what I termed Rush's irresponsible virtual abandonment
of his own Falcon-hosted website and its paying members. They have now
agreed to provide 3 free months to Rush's remaining members.
Chris Steele, Falcon's director of production, allegedly flew into
a rage as a result and was reportedly telling associates and friends
that "I'm going to get Kruezer and shut him down any way I can", according
to my sources within and outside Falcon.
Troy Prickett - Falcon's PR man - even refused to return Michael Musto's
call on the subject after cavalierly dismissing the concerns of Matt
Rush's website members complaining to me as not being worth his time.
Steele at first tried to claim that my well-known picture of Matthew
Rush (BELOW) - taken by me on my own equipment during a meeting at a
restaurant some months ago, and duly copyrighted by me - was a "Falcon
copyrighted image". When I informed Steele that I had the original negative
to disprove his false claim, he apparently set about to to make some
other baseless claim.
Steele noticed a candid photo of himself - taken at the GAYVNs - that
had been given me by a GAYVN photographer to use at my discretion. I
had it on my site a few days last month and then moved it and other
outdated material off the site.
But that didn't stop Chris Steele from engaging in what in my opinion
can only be called dirty tricks and the most vicious anti-competitive
business practice I have ever seen in this industry. He contacted my
current webhost and claimed that the candid GAYVN photo of himself was
a "copyright infringement", and even claimed that I need his personal
written permission to have ANY photo of himself on my site - and that
includes Falcon retail video boxcovers with him on them.
The arrogance and vanity of Chris Steele are boundless, in my opinion.
In fact and in law, Chris Steele is NOT the copyright holder of any
photo of himself unless it's a self-portrait. In fact and in law, the
photographer is the copyright holder. Yet the photographer didn't file
a complaint with my webhost - Chris Steele did, despite having no legal
standing to do so.
Even worse, Steele gave the impression to my webhost that the photo
in question was currently on my site when he made his complaint last
week - when in fact it had long since been gone.
So here we have Chris Steele - a man I used to admire and respect -
pursuing what in my opinion is the most malicious harassment on the
basis of a DOUBLY FALSE claim - that he's the copyright holder (NOT
TRUE), and that the photo he claimed was "infringing" was on my site
last week when he made his baseless complaint (ALSO NOT TRUE).
Is it any wonder that I believe CHRIS STEELE is working hand-in-hand
with certain obsessive/compulsives within the industry who have declared
it their mission to get rid of DAMON KRUEZER - by fair means or foul?
Have any of you EVER heard of trying to shut down a News and Information
website due to highly critical - but all too true - reports about members
complaining about a model's website, and then trying to cover up the
actual motivation by a phony claim of "copyright infringement" involving
an innocuous GAYVN candid photo of whom the complainant (Steele) is
NOT the copyright holder in the first place?
Now you know the REAL DEAL - not the heavily "spun" version coming
from those so terrified of the truthful investigative reporting I do,
they try to defame, slander, and misdirect in any way they can.
Interestingly, Steele - like the other anti-competitive plotters -
likes to say that DAMON KRUEZER doesn't matter, no one visits my site,
etc.
But if that's true - why such a HUGE effort to make trouble on even
the most false and baseless grounds, as CHRIS STEELE has tried to do
in my opinion, in hopes of shutting down my website permanently?
The light of truth quickly overcame Steele's false claim. For all of
you who are as outraged as I am by such despicable and shameful tactics,
I urge you to contact CHRIS STEELE at Falcon or at his website email
address and tell him exactly what you think.
I also call upon every fair-minded and ethical person in the industry
to resist and oppose the kind of corporate arrogance and anti-competitive
business practices that I believe Chris Steele and his handlers at Falcon
represent.
This isn't about personality politics, and it's not about who likes
or dislikes Damon Kruezer, Chris Steele, Matt Rush, Falcon, or any other
person or company.
It's about the ability to work within the industry and be free of anti-competitive
practices and harassment by those who can't handle the truth as reported
by DAMON KRUEZER and other colleagues who tell it like it is - not the
way the corporate elite want it to be presented.
And just to be clear - there is only ONE legitimate, authentic Damon
Kruezer site, and that is www.damonkruezer.com. Set your bookmarks to
www.damonkruezer.com and don't be deceived by the impersonation of those
who want desperately to be me - but never can be and never will be.
Same is true of email. The ONLY authentic email is damon@damonkruezer.com.
Ignore all others.
Note the correct spelling of KRUEZER in both Website name and email.
Let's show that the jealous schemers and anti-competitive plotters cannot
prevail. Only the truth can do that.
Thanks for your time and attention.
Brad Shaw: 'I Have Not Seen Conversions Like This In
Years'
Brad writes
on JBM: "Our new gay site, Barebackbottoms.com, 1:30 on volume
of traffic. Been doing under 1:40 since launch."
More Evidence That Luke's A Fag
ABOVE: Luke with Scott Fayner, owner and writer of l-keford.com
Pity Is Luke's Trojan Horse To Get Into The Troy Of Women
JamesN
writes on XPT: "I think pity is Luke's huge wooden horse (normal
gift) to get himself into Troy with women. I think I've read he's rode
the nurturing instinct into boning... back in the day, maybe some other
ones. If you've got thick skin or were born without shame, it's a brilliant
strategy playing the stray-puppy role--it totally removes the need to
impress chicks with stuff that costs money, wit, job, etc.
SmutMutant writes:
Yeah James, playing the sensitive Air Supply fan w/ a romantic streak
in need of fulfillment may just be a soundrels way of working the sympathy
factor. Then again, I think women interested in Air Supply are in limited
circulation and they doubtfully read porn blogs or that flashnews site,
so he might be using it to draw industry moths to the flames of romance
in his pants. Anything that blatantly pathetic must have some nefarious
logic behind it and if not it reveals a skewed mind that almost makes
one question his perspective on the topics he covers and considers newsworthy.
Basically, if he doesn't have the common sense NOT to do a stunt like
this then one must question his judgment in regard to his chosen "career"
path. i.e. being a Matt Drudge of sorts in something as ridiculous as
the porn industry. Then again I must admit it's almost as ridiculous
to critically analyze pornography like I do, but this an industry filled
w/ absurdity. That's why I like it.
JamesN replies: "Hey, he's figured out how to make a living, even
get on the E! channel by doing very little unpleasant or stressful work
and obviously spends most of his day on what he's interested in at the
moment, which is reflected on the other site. I don't give a f--- about
the intellectual elite of LA (it took me a while to write those words)
but it's kind of entertaining watching how they interact with him."
Evil
Angel Files Multi-Million Dollar, Federal Counterfeiting Suit Against
Chatsworth Distributor
By Mike Ramone
LOS ANGELES - Evil Angel has filed a multi-million dollar, federal
counterfeiting lawsuit against a Chatsworth-based distributor, DVD Concepts,
Inc., its principal, Alon Nottea and other defendants.
Evil Angel attorney Al Gelbard alleged that DVD Concepts has sold counterfeit
Evil Angel discs.
What Do You Say When You Learn Your Friend Is Undergoing
Chemo-Therapy?
My mother died
of cancer when I was four.
I've known a lot of people who've undergone chemotherapy and the like.
I don't pour out concern when I hear the news. My response is almost
always, "Oh." And then I take my cues from the person I'm conversing
with.
This is both natural to my instincts to listen rather than to try to
console (listening is my form of consoling), as well as my following of
Judaism's teachings about entering the home of a mourner. You let the
mourner start and direct the conversation. They might want to remember
their loved one or they might want to talk about something entirely different.
Similarly, someone diagnosed with cancer might want to take the conversation
in many different directions.
A friend writes today: "I sort of love the fact that you didn't
so much as say, "Oh no." Or "My prayers are with you." Or anything resembling
concern. You are a strange bird, though."
Any time I've told someone that I will pray for him it's been meant as
a joke.
I'm not arguing my response is the right one. Different responses are
natural to different people. I'm not somebody imbued with tremendous common-sense
and a take-charge attitude to other people's problems. I'm not a leader.
I'm an observer.
I was bed-ridden
for six years with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and still struggle with
CFS. I try to treat people the way I want to be treated.
JMT writes: "It doesn't matter what you say. Just say *something,*
and stay in touch. When I went through that, I couldn't believe how little
contact I had from some people I considered friends. On the other hand,
I had people I hadn't seen for years, even decades, come out of the woodwork
and be supportive. People are funny."
Catherine
Bell On Nicis Girls? Just
Eddie's Fantasy
I have no confirmation of this, and simply present it as the type of
hearsay that might let one know one has indulged in too many escorts (i.e.,
you see a beautiful woman on TV and your first question is -- is she available?).
It is common for actresses to work as hookers. David Hasselhoff's wife
worked as a hooker according to the book High Concept.
Fast Eddie writes
on TER (and he's only fantasizing here):
Well, tonight was the series finale of JAG... so, no more weekly dose
of Catherine Bell...
sigh! :-( But then again... maybe she won't get a new series; the big
mortage on her house, the payments on her luxury cars, the botox treatments...
so she's starts needing money... yeah, YEAH... Suddenly, I start hearing
rumblings... a word here, a word there. Catherine "might" be available
UTR (under the radar). Then a member of Nici's emails me to tell me
it true... Catherine Bell IS available! Oh, happy day... I can't wait!!!!
So... does anyone have direct contact info?
Jason Sechrest
Vouches For My Heterosexuality
Luke: You don't think I am gay, do you, because I like Air
Supply?
DV8Boi: what's Air Supply?
Luke: If I could just get some kind of bona fides from you about my heterosexuality,
I'd yell it to the world.
DV8Boi: HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA
DV8Boi: well that fact that you so desperately seek them is not a very
good start, my friend
Luke: Just because I am strong enough to be vulnerable with my feelings
does not make me gay!
Luke: And I like sensitive love songs. Doesn't mean I want to take it
in my bum.
Luke: Tell that nasty Mr Albo that I'm not queer!
Luke: Or I'll throw a hissy fit
DV8Boi: We should take you to a gay club and see how you fare.
DV8Boi: Maybe the TV Guide Channel can follow us. They're desperate for
programming.
Behind The Scenes With Jason Sechrest On TV Guide's Open
Call
Jason writes in his online
diary (reprinted with permission):
There's so much you don't know about what happened behind the scenes
on my episode of The
TV Guide Channel's Open Call
and now that it has aired, I am at liberty to tell all, lay it all out
on the table the whole sordid story from beginning to end. You want
to know what really happened? Here's it is… which, ironically,
is more entertaining than the show itself!
Once upon a time, my friend Angel
Benton (independent film actor and world-famous "I'm
huge in Japan!" Britney
Spears drag queen) rang me up and asked me to accompany
him on a cattle call to audition for a reality series on The TV Guide
Channel. In their breakdown they were looking for who would be television's
next wild best friends and -- in their words -- "the next Paris
and Nicole, the next Simple Life."
I've never seen The Simple Life, but after hearing Paris's
rules for life from her autobio, Angel convinced me that I have an awful
lot in common with Paris Hilton. Plus, I can't deny that Angel and I
together are like reality TV fodder. Our antics are pretty mesmerizing
when we go out in public together. However, we are -- or were, at the
time of the audition -- far from best friends. We'd hung out a few times,
we'd had our tongue down each other's throats and we are probably the
only other person to each other with whom we can relate of being on
what our fearless leader Kathy Griffin calls The D-List.
(She's so B-List now though, it's not even funny.)
Angel also happens to be a virgin and I happen to have experience
as a slut. I quickly decided our sell to the TV Guide Channel would
be this: We are the Angel and the Devil, the blonde and the brunette,
the Britney and the Christina,
the virgin and the whore.
So the two of us trek down to Hollywood and Highland one sunny Sunday
afternoon and wait in line for our audition. In front of us is straight
male porn star Dave Pounder,
who is at every cattle call for reality television I've ever been to.
He's hitting on girls in line and announcing that he f---s pussy for
a living. The last time I saw him do this was at an audition for an
MTV
show that I ended up snagging. He, on the other hand, they wouldn't
even put in front of a camera for an audition . It was, "Thanks
for your interest, have a nice day," upon which he was quick to
point out, "He's in porn too! He's in porn!" I feigned befuddlement
and told the casting director I don't know who this man is and I've
never seen him in my life. As he walked off, he was still talking about
pussy. Now, today here he is auditioning for TV Guide and it's apparently
not his first time in this line. The producers later told me that he
showed up for every audition they had and wouldn't you know he wound
up on one of the episodes! Dave's big episode was the one that aired
right before ours. So congratulations, Dave! Welcome to the D-List.
Looking at the rest of the people in line, I turn to Angel and say,
"We're definitely getting a call back. Trust me. I have a good
gut instinct about these things."
It's right around that time that this woman appears with a megaphone
and of course it's always the people who don't need megaphones who choose
to use them. Overbearing in both personality and stature, this is Markie
Costello, producer for The TV Guide Channel. As I would later
come to learn, she is also the head of her own talent agency for hosts
and the granddaughter of one of my biggest childhood idols, comedic
genius Lou Costello. Markie screams into the megaphone,
"Who wants their own TV show?!" The crowd does not go wild.
She is followed with a camera and picks people out of the crowd and
asks them abrasive questions. Thankfully, she does not pick us. She
explains what she's going to be looking for in the audition and with
that, they begin slowly letting people into the studio. We arrived relatively
early so we were in pretty fast.
The instant I step into the studio, I realize it is the former stomping
grounds of the brother (sister?) I never had, Ryan
Seacrest. The logo for his now defunct show On
Air is everywhere. No, I mean everywhere. They used it
as wallpaper actually. And there's his heavily airbrushed face, too,
wearing almost as much makeup as I. We do have so much in common what
with the hosting thing and our inherent need to do ourselves up with
more foundation than Jon Benet Ramsey for any public
appearance.
Before too long, we're in front of Markie and many cameras. We explain
who we are, how we met, why we're best friends and why the TV Guide
Channel should give us our own reality show for all of five minutes.
Markie loves us. I can tell. And I love Markie. She's a bitch troll
who tells it like it is and shoots from the hip. I think she's fabulous.
After the audition, we are greeted by another camera crew in a post
audition interview where we are asked what we feel our chances are of
getting a call back. My sixth sense is telling me this is not the last
I'll see of Miss Costello and her pant suits. Angel is less than convinced.
Here's where things get interesting!
Angel and I both receive a phone call that evening from Markie telling
us that we are one of three pairs of best friends getting called back
out of the hundreds that showed up that day.
We're also then told the truth for the first time: This is not just
an audition for our own reality series on the TV Guide Channel. This
already is a reality series on the TV Guide Channel and we are now officially
on it. The show is called Open Call and it's
a reality series about the casting process for reality series. Markie
Costello is not only the producer, she's also the host. Doh! We've been
had.
The good news here is that we're definitely going to be on The TV
Guide Channel. The bad news is that we're appearing on what is practically
a game show, competing against two other teams for our own shows. Oh
well, what the hell. If Griffin can do the Squares,
we can do Open Call! Anything to stay on that D-List.
A week later, we're back at the studio and we meet the other two pairs.
Out of the six people altogether, we are the only guys and the only
ones who are gay. The first two girls remind me a lot of Glori-Anne
Gilbert and Melissa
Wolf, a couple of older off-beat pinup girls who look and
act like they've just been plucked out of an adult comic strip. The
other pair is made up of two plain Janes who hail from the Midwest.
They're on their first vacation to the big city and just happened to
be passing by Hollywood and Highland when they asked what the big line
was for and decided, "Why not? Let's have some fun and audition."
They are cute and perky enough, but don't have a lot of energy or personality
and they're definitely NOT the next Paris and Nicole. At this point,
I'm thinking we have this thing in the bag!
We are followed around by a camera crew for the entire day and are
interviewed by a panel of C-List celebrity judges: Shavonda
from The Real World: Philadelphia, who I keep
referring to as Shaneequa; Jamie from The
Real World: San Diego, who I totally don't recognize;
and John Henson, who at first I don't recognize as
the former host of E!'s
Talk Soup and later apologize because I have always been
such a huge fan of the Muppets. All of this is on camera. They have
nearly ten hours of footage on us and I'm sorry, but we were funny as
all f---. I was flirting openly with crew members and talking about
hanging out with porn stars. My inhibitions had left the building like
Elvis. I was ON that day! It was like my radio show
without the naked people. They want Paris & Nicole? They want wild
and off the wall? We're giving it to them so fierce it was like, "f---
being the next Paris & Nicole. We're the first Angel & Jason!"
I mean, come on! The comic strip girls are like in their late 40's pretending
to be 20 and the other girls are sweet but just so boring I can barely
be around them for the day much less watch an entire series about them!
We are so in. We will MAKE the TV Guide Channel. We will be to the TV
Guide Channel what Madonna
was to MTV. And we
would've been too! If only…
During the last five minutes of filming, before the judges were to
make their final decisions, one of the plain Janes pulled the dirtiest
trick in the book. We all learned it in elementary school and when push
comes to shove, we know it's the last card to pull, but we never expected
it from these two nobodys from Omaha, Nebraska or wherever the f---
they're from.
The bitch broke down and CRIED. Yup, shed tears. Right there in front
of the judges and on camera. And over what? She revealed to the judges
in an intimate interview that she had been engaged but knew it wasn't
right for either of them to be married to each other so she cheated
on him so that it could be her fault and not his. She bared the brunt
and took the heat so they wouldn't make a mistake for the rest of their
lives. … Honey, get off the cross because people need the wood,
okay? You're a slut and stop trying to justify it as anything else in
your head. You're a f---ing whore and it's okay. But don't try to make
yourself out to be the victim and don't cry about it on nationally syndicated
television. This is not your Barbara Walters interview.
This Lorna Luft looking bitch who is hosting is not
Maury Povich. This is Markie f---ing Costello and the
cunting search for the next god damned Paris and Nicole!
Needless to say, they won. What you don't see at the end of the show
is the highlight of the day. When the judges are giving their opinions
of us before voting, Shakendra and Jaime tell Angel and I, "You
two seem to know who you are a little too much. When we went in for
The Real World, we didn't know who we were and for reality
television, it should be more about finding yourself. Self-discovery!"
"Ok, but I have something to say," interjects Angel.
"No," says Markie. "You can't talk right now."
"No, no, but just one quick thing!" says Angel. "We're
not here to audition for the next Real World. We're here to
audition for the next Simple Life. The next Paris and Nicole."
A look of confusion sweeps across the judges faces. They look to Markie.
Markie looks like she's just soiled herself. Has she not told the judges
this? "That's a good point!" she says quickly, wide-eyed,
"and one we probably should have taken into account. Oh well, turn
those ballots in!"
LaQuanda has no hesitation now. She's just been called out by a gay
virgin on camera and she's not having it. The San Diego girl looks like
a deer caught in headlights. She is so confused and looking at all of
us, silently pleading, "What am I supposed to do? Oh no! OH NO!
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO??!" I kindly give her a look that says,
"Please, girl. It's the TV Guide Channel. Not E! Turn in your ballot.
No one's gonna cry."… Oh wait, maybe someone will.
So it is decided. The plain Janes have it. They are the next Paris
& Nicole. When the show finally aired, Angel and I found that they
had changed the name of the episode from the next Paris & Nicole
to "The Next Best Friends" (which is really obviously a blunder
because every other episode is the next Martha
Stewart, the next Donald Trump, etc.)
and of the ten hours of hilarious footage we gave them, only five minutes
collectively was used. Naturally. If they'd kept the original title
or shown even an iota of what we were like in the studio that day, everyone
would be saying, "Why on Earth did the plain Janes from Kansas
get it?"
Oh, and that's the other thing. What did they get? Their own reality
series? No. Their own pilot for a reality series? No. They were followed
around with cameras for a day and it was edited down to the last five
minutes of the show. If we'd known that's what we were competing for
all along, we'd have never even gone in the first place.
In short, we were had on false pretenses. Well, sort of. You can't
milk the milker! I got a s--- load of press from it because of my own
press releases, my resume now says recurring for the TV Guide Channel
and I'm using their logo on my web site. No one can take advantage of
Jason Sechrest. Just try to give me lemons. I'll make a f---ing chocolate
soufflé.
Incidentally, John Henson voted for us and now Angel is ready to lose
his virginity to him. He also told me after the show that he felt I
would make an amazing host and would like to see my Internet radio show
sometime. So, hell, I'd say it's been a good month between that and
the standing ovation from Queer
as Folk's Hal Sparks.
And hey, I like Open Call. I've seen more episodes than just
mine now and I find myself riveted every time I see it. We had about
as much air time as everyone else on the show, really. The show is basically
just a vehicle for Markie Costello. Angel thinks that's disgusting and
wrong that it's all about the host and not about the people themselves.
I say, "Go, Markie!" I'd do the same thing if I were in
your position as producer and host. I think she's funny as f--- too.
My parents didn't think so though. My father said, "I didn't care
for Costello. She's no Lou." My mother said, "Someone should
tell her to stay away from bright yellow jackets. The attire, that is.
Not the bees."
Luke
F-rd: More Gay Than Lord
Master Damien?
Mike
Albo writes:
This is the most pathetic thing we've heard in quite a spell. We asked
a female acquaintance how she would interpret this story, and this is
what she told us.
"This is a guy so desperate he has to advertise for a date. Girls don't
like desperate guys. He has feminine taste in music. He sounds like
one of those overly 'sensitive' guys. A vegan? A walk on the beach?
Sent a woman flowers 'too soon?' Very girlish."
And how do we interpret her comments? "Luke is a fag." But, to be truthful,
we've always had our suspicions.
(Photo,
January 20004, by Marco Pallotti of LittleGrayGuy.com. More
from Marco.)
From
Velvet Rope.com:
Hmm, not bad but what's with the cat?
What, it isn't obvious? "I like Air Supply. I have to make public pleas
for dates. Here's me holding a picture of a cat."
Translation: I AM A PUSSY.
"meaningful conversation with no distancing devices."
Is that some sort of recent LA psychobable that translated = Please
wear a skirt on our date? ...or... some sort of recent LA psychobable
that translated = I am a pussy? Please clear this up for me so I can
be hip.
JMassif writes: It's actually translated as: "Please don't wear a skirt
on our date, as I'll be the pussy wearing one."
Zero Interest writes:
Here are some of the "distancing devices" Mr. Ford is looking to avoid.
LA Times pop music critic Robert Hilbrun writes today: "Between these
extremes, other Coachella acts dealt with love in various forms, such
as the gentler, rock-noir style of the Raveonettes, the Danish team with
lots of Phil Spector and Blondie influences, and the superficial romanticism
of Keane, a British band that reaches for the beauty of Coldplay but sometimes
ends up as slight as Air Supply."
What a painful difference 14-months
can make. From March 2005.
Darren
Roberts Takes The Throne
I'm seeking reactions to Darren's rise to AVN CEO. Who is this mystery
man Darren Roberts?
AVN President Paul Fishbein is out of town.
David Aaron Clark writes: "Sounds like a palace coup has been completed."
I figure that Paul is better than Darren at publishing and public relations
(dealing with customers), while Darren is better about bottom-line-business
stuff. Darren will work budgets and the business side and Paul will focus
on the publishing/creative side. It's always been that way but now Darren
gets more latitude to run the business. Everything else, Tim Connelly
(AVN publisher), Tony Lovett (Editor of AVN Online), Mike Ramone (AVN
Editor-in-Chief) etc. remains the same.
I call a friend. "What does this mean?"
"What have I been telling you all along," he says.
"Darren is the real owner of AVN?"
"That's right. See?"
"What's more powerful? CEO or President?"
"CEO. A President is a figurehead [just as in Israeli politics,
the prime minister has the power and the president is a figurehead]. A
person is kept in as president when they don't want to lose all their
business when everyone thinks that they're gone."
"Gene Ross said this weeks ago."
"It's what a lot of people have been saying. The funny part is that
nobody knows who Darren Roberts is."
"They just say 'weasel.'"
Tod Hunter writes:
The Lovely Mrs. Hunter called this one a couple of years ago. She said
Tim and Darren would chop away the people who were loyal to Paul and
replace them with their own loyalists, and then give Paul the heave-ho.
She knows corporate.
At the same time, she also suggested that I polish up the ol' résumé,
because my loyalty to Paul - which I had at the time - made me a marked
man.
She was right. She probably will be right.
Mrs Hunter writes:
President power, my fanny...
You're not reading the business section like you should. When Roy Disney
made a run at the studio through a brilliantly conceived campaign taken
directly to the sentimentality of Disney stockholders he took Eisner
out of the presidency of The Walt Disney Company...he retains his position
of CEO. CEO is where dad goes when he wants to retire and hand the reins
over to sonny and still wants to keep his hands on the money (but is
tired of running the company). We're not talking the political arena
here, we're talking American corporate politics. And, BTW...as a good
rule of thumb on the world stage, the power or impotence of a titular
leader increases or decreases in direct proportion to the visibility
of her or his "right-hand" man (or woman)...
Mrs. Hunter (who has a day job and has outlasted countless managers
and vice presidents by keeping her mouth shut and her eyes open...)
The
Void Inside
I have this big emptiness inside that I am always trying to fill by blogging
about myself, self-publishing books about myself, Googleing my name every
week, checking Technorati daily
for any reference to me, checking my email every five minutes, posting
on chat boards to get a reaction...
I just realized how empty my life by emailing somebody who I expected
had SpamBlock (Darren Roberts, the new CEO at AVN, I wanted to know how
his responsibilities would change). And I found myself thinking, "Good,
I know I will get a reply, because I will get that automatic reply from
his spam blocker."
One of the things I hate about pitching an article is that half the times
I do it, I get no reply. And when I do get a reply, it tends to come after
a week or so. I so hate rejection (because my sense of my own worth is
so fragile), that I rarely pitch editors with stories and I rarely ask
out women I'm interested in (if I think they are too beautiful or too
good for me).
I think this void I feel is also felt by many women who become porn stars
to try to fill the emptiness.
ASPIRING
PORN STAR NEEDS HELP WITH HER NAME
What's in a name? Plenty, if you're an aspiring porn actress who's
laying down plans to make it big. The adult film actress in question
is a 24-year-old Houston woman who is planning on filming her first
flick this summer and wants America's help picking her screen name.
L.A.
Man Needs Woman To Celebrate Air Supply Anniversary
LOS ANGELES (Wireless Flash) - If you're a smart, funny woman who is
free on May 12, a man in Los Angeles wants to take you out on a date.
As long as you like the 1980s soft rock group Air
Supply.
May 12 marks the 30th anniversary that Air Supply members Russell Hitchcock
and Graham Russell started a partnership that created hits like "Lost
In Love," "All Out Of Love" and "Every Woman In The World."
One person particularly touched by the band is an Australian journalist
named Luke F-rd, who says Air Supply songs articulate what he "feels
about love but rarely experiences."
He wants to honor the band's anniversary by taking a woman out to a
vegan restaurant and a walk along the beach while engaging in "meaningful
conversation with no distancing devices."
Ford hopes the experience revives his romantic side, which he says
has been dormant ever since a woman reprehended him for sending flowers
too soon in a relationship.
Ford hopes the woman is attractive but says "more than 15 lbs. overweight
is not a problem."
Khunrum writes: "Good going Luke. I boinked several fatties before
switching to Asian women. They usually have low self esteem and therefore
are easier to get horizontal. Just thing of the deep footprints she'll
leave in the sand during your romantic walk along the beach. Why not do
this again on the university of Aussie puke rockers. The LRB...When Little
River Band formed in 1975, Australia immediately took notice."
Mike South writes: "Uh oh yer already lowering your standards. 'More
than 15 lbs overweight is not a problem.' Dude, the first sign of a bad
salesman is he lowers his price. A REALLY bad salesman lowers his price
before he finishes his pitch. You fall into the latter category."
Fred writes: "I gotta admit. Finding anyone who would want to remember
Air Supply, rather (rather than blot it out of his memory) is certainly
a news item."
A friend at AVN writes: "I think the romantic in each of us secretly
loves Air Supply. Surely we've all had those moments of wailing along
in our car, tears of understanding streaming down our face... haven't
we?! But don't tell anyone I said that; it's a secret."
I emailed Miss Jameson:
Hi Jenna, As you well know, it will be Air Supply's 30th anniversary
May 12th. Do you have a good contract girl or know a good woman you
can recommend to me to help me mark this important anniversary?
Lionel
Hutz writes on Velvet Rope: "Reprehended? What does that mean?"
JMassif writes: "It's the reprehensible reprimand... the lowest
and meanest kind... like when you put the wrong woman's name on a bouquet
of spring wildflowers."
Dannya writes: "Wow. And I thought my life was meaningless and pathetic."
JMassif writes: "Just because he's a vegan Air Supply fan looking
for love on a message board about Air... .... oh... yeah, damn he IS a
loser ..."
Luke replies: "I am not a loser. I
am a highly respected journalist."
Corey3D writes: "This is pathetic. This guy is using any excuse
to whore up his career and try to get his hands in a vegan gal's pants."
Tommy writes: "The whole thing is about his blog and his 40-something
mugshot. Reminds me of that episode of AbFab where someone commented it
was bad enough having to read what some journalist wrote without having
to look at a picture of their face."
Massive writes: "Imagine loving Air Supply so much that you're willing
to base meeting a potential mate around that love. That's a raw deal no
matter how you look at it."
Bornyo
writes on XPT: "Duke/Luke, you may have jumped the shark with
this post. Like Monkey said the other day, you need another Marc Wallice."
Smutmutant writes: "Geez, Luke. That's most pathetic thing I've
seen in years. Any respect went out the door. Air Supply?"
Smelly Monkey writes:
Great post Luke. I love him. I never knew he was a vegan, a jewish
vegan, his gas must strip paint off a wall.
You can never tell when Luke is being serious or joking, both have
the exact same feel to it, its funny if he's joking but even more funny
if he isn't.
Question for Luke, if i can get the slightly over weight liz the bunny
to be your date will you take lots of pictures as the night goes on?
SmutMutant responds:
Actually it's unintentional comedy b/c I think he's serious. I didn't
know he was Australian. Just wait 'til the chick finds out he's a porn
"journalist" maybe she'll want to cuddle then and drink Fosters w/ Luke
from a champagne glass on the beach looking at the sunset arm in arm.
May I suggest Lara Roxxx?
Play it
loud!
I can make the run or stumble,
I can make the final block;
And I can make every tackle, at the sound of the whistle,
I can make all the stadiums rock.
I can make tonight forever,
Or I can make it disappear by the dawn;
And I can make you every promise that has ever been made,
And I can make all your demons be gone.
But I'm never gonna make it without you,
Do you really want to see me crawl?
And I'm never gonna make it like you do,
Making love out of nothing at all
Top-Dollar
Porn Stars
I'm not sure how this was computed, but it looks right:
1. Jenna Jameson
2. Crissy Moran
3. Tera Patrick
4. Briana Banks
5. Devon
6. Krystal Steal
7. Catalina Cruz
8. Silvia Saint
9. Aria Giovanni
10. Rachel Aziani
11. Brittney Skye
12. Amber Michaels
13. Veronica Zemanova
14. Gauge
15. Tawny Roberts
16. Jill Kelly
17. Asia Carrera
18. Chloe Jones
19. Sky Lopez
20. Alexis Amore
21. Sophie Sweet
22. Jenna Haze
23. Monica Sweetheart
24. Anetta Keys
25. Zdenka Podkapova
26. Taylor Rain
27. Savanna Samson
28. Kyla Cole
29. Aurora Snow
30. Adele Stephens
31. Jesse Capelli
32. Jessica Jaymes
33. Sunrise Adams
34. Lonnie Waters
35. Sandy Fantasy
36. Adriana Sage
37. Ashley Blue
38. Bella Donna
39. Tabitha Stevens
40. Veronica Vanoza
Remembering Holly Landes Through Blacksonblondes.com
BDM
writes on ADT:
I saw Holly on the Oprah Winfrey show in the months just before she
died, and she did not look good at all. She hadn't been in any recent
movies, (that I knew of), and was hooking in Nevada at the time. That's
what the Oprah show was about, hookers.
Darren
Roberts Becomes AVN's CEO, But Fishbein Stays On As AVN President
So who is the boss? Who really owns AVN? Gene Ross posted a couple of
months ago that Darren was the number one guy at AVN these days.
I chatted with Mike South.
South1226: whats going on at avn? Darren Roberts now CEO.
South1226: Fish is pres, Ramone is higher profile, and we hear less and
less about Connelly
South1226: Is the writing on the wall? Are we delaying Connellys execution
by writing about it?
South1226: I'm 47...bangin a 6 foot tall 19/y/o fgirlfriend. A student.
She has no desire to be in porn but is amused that I am.
South1226: if life was any better I couldnt stand it
Porn Star Performance
Ilhouse
writes on ADT:
I just want to warn girls of Stoney Curtis, AKA Brian. He owns Lethal
Hardcore and Celestial Productions. When you go to his house for a meeting,
he will push himself on you, practically rape you and tell you that
you will not be in his videos, unless you screw him repeatedly. He only
gives you a couple of hundred dollars, then uses you once in a video.
He is totally sleazy and everyone should know how he operates.
Stoney operates pornstarperformance.com,
where I read these words by Chef Jeff:
I booked Ginger
through Naughty Talent about
10 days in advance of our shoot. The day before the shoot Naughty Talent's
Chris, tells me she can't make it but doesn't offer a reason. I say
fine, who else you got? So, we booked another girl and she flakes 2
hours before the shoot. I had booked Sara, also through Naughty Talent,
for the very next day, about 2 hours before the shoot they tell me she
has to cancel due to an infection. I will not book through Naughty Talent
ever again. Thankfully, I was able to book two excellent last minute
replacements through SpieglerGirls.com. Taryn Thomas and Jordan Fleiss.
Both girls were sexy and professional.
...........
I chatted with Tim this morning from Naughty Talent. He said that it
was a bad week all around. Sometimes you can't do anything about the
girls. He agreed to waive his booking fee next time around. We will
give Naughty another try. Thanks for the waiver of the booking fee Tim!
Craven Morehead writes April 29:
first i book OC
Ginger threw Tim at naughty .He then forgets 3 days later, the day
of the shoot. So how nice of him to let me shoot her the following day.
and boy i wish he didnt. in 8 years shes in the top 5 WORST performers
ever. "how many minutes", "how many positions", "this hurts", "hes too
rough", "i cant do doggie, cause it hurts, spoon cause it hurts my side
or missionary cause it hits my bladder" then proceeds to ask the male
talent if he ate beef the night before cause it makes penises feel weird.
NOTE to TIM....... stop wasting mine and everyone elses time, screen
these crack whores.
Michael
writes:
I hired Papi Caliente, a black man, age 30, for a Dark Secret Video
shoot on April 19, 2005. He informed me he was experienced before the
camera, and he did arrive on time. But on this day he was largely unable
to get wood. He would jack off to pictures he brought for 10 to 15 minutes
to get hard enough to work 5 minutes with the very attractive girl thus
delaying matters by a few hours (we tried to locate a replacement, without
success). At pop shot time, the girl told him not to cum on her face,
he deliberately did anyway, making her very angry. When I described
the shoot as "unfortunate" he got argumentative saying he thought he
did "very well" (was he at the same shoot I was?) and blamed his performance
problems on me because I had to replace the female performer originally
scheduled with the one he worked with. The new girl (Summer Lynn) was
fine. We got him out the door as quickly as we could.
Robert Field writes: "Stacey Cash had an appointment for short solo
shoot, she was a NO-SHOW, meaning she did not show up and did not call
before or after call time. Twice during the week she confirmed she would
be there."
A Call For Higher Whore Ethics
Helpful writes:
I was saddened to see that Charlie Sheen's alleged porn-whore, Chloe
Jones, had sold her lurid story to the National Enquirer. Where are
her ethics? Where is the outcry from fellow whores about her breaking
a client's confidential trust? Am I wrong or except during fellatio
is a whore supposed to keep her mouth shut?
Fred the patent lawyer writes:
I am a member of a profession with a code of ethics that requires preserving
client communications in conficence. What Ms. Jones did was, in my opinion,
highly unethical. I believe that the legislature should enact similar
rules for hookers.
Gee, you can't trust anybody.
New Destiny (Homegrown) Vs. Voice Media (Cybererotica)
David S. Olson, Attorney for New Destiny Internet Group, writes:
Farrell Timlake told me you called him for a statement. For now, I
have asked my clients not to comment as no ruling has yet been issued
by Justice Neal. The hearing was indeed held during the week of April
18-22 (and lasted all five days). I will say that I thought the hearing
went exceedingly well for New Destiny Internet Group LLC (owner of homegrownvideo.com),
I anticipate a very favorable decision, and my clients and I very much
look forward to receipt of Justice Neal's decision.
We are now in process of preparing closing briefs, which briefing is
due to be completed by May 20. We should hopefully receive Justice Neal's
decision shortly thereafter and will be more than happy to comment on
the decision once it is out.
Where Are The Boob Jobs?
Since the redesign of Penthouse magazine in the March issue, I haven't
noticed any women in there with breast jobs. There are no longer any shots
of spreading, insertion, ejaculation, or urination. The editorial staff
has remained the same and the editorial content is largely similar (Dr.
Victoria Zdrok has replaced advice columnist Xaviera Hollander).
Alexander the Poet writes:
You should be thankful you don't see boob jobs in Penthouse anymore.
Maybe adult stars have learned their lesson and started to research
plastic surgeons before they go and butcher their bodies. There are
worse boob jobs out there than there are good ones. Perhaps the ratio
is 5 bad ones for 1 good one. In addition, I think we have reached a
point where, we're just plain tired of seeing implants!
As far as there being no shots of spreading, insertion, ejaculation,
or urination, I think they are trying to compete with mags like Maxim,
FHM, and Stuff, since it seems that those type of mags are getting more
sales as of late. So I guess Penthouse may think that by being less
raunchy, they may increase in sales.
Report:
Japan sex industry ensnares Latin women
LIMA, Peru (AP) -- At least 1,700 women from Latin America and the
Caribbean are lured each year into sexual slavery in Japan's huge illicit
sex industry, according to a new report.
A team of researchers hired by the Organization of American States
found that most of the women come from Colombia, Bolivia, Brazil, Mexico
and Peru. The team of researchers -- led by Phillip Linderman, an expert
on loan from the U.S. State Department -- presented the "Rapid Assessment
Report" to an international seminar on human trafficking sponsored by
Peru's Foreign Ministry on Friday.
The OAS analysis was culled from interviews with presumed victims,
Japanese immigration records and crime data.
The 37-page report estimated tens of thousands of undocumented foreign
women in Japan, mostly from other Asian countries, are exploited by
crime organizations, like Yakuza, Japan's second-largest crime syndicate.
Whatever happened to Bambi Woods of "Debbie does Dallas"?
Alex
from Montreal writes on GFY: "I just finished watching a very
interesting documentary about Debbie Does Dallas. The documentary mentioned
she only did one movie and then disapeared without a trace. Anyone knows
what really happened to her and if she did more than one movie?"
From
Channel 4 in Britain:
The Dark Side of Porn season continues. Debbie Does Dallas was made
25 years ago and is one of the world's highest-grossing pornographic
films of all time. The plot is simple, a group of teenage girls sell
sexual favours in order to raise enough cash to get into cheerleading
school, but the mystery shrouding the film and the people involved is
much less straight forward. But the film once dubbed "happy porn" by
industry insiders has a darker side that has left a multitude of unanswered
questions in its wake. Who made all the money? What became of the cast
members? And what really happened to the film's star, Bambi Woods? With
organised crime, suicide, murder, a huge undercover FBI sting and several
unexplained disappearances to boot, it's this secret history that assures
the legacy of Debbie Does Dallas lives on. But will the real story behind
this iconic film ever be fully uncovered?
From
the Times of London:
Debbie Does Dallas, the 1970s adult movie about a cheerleading hooker,
is one of the five top-grossing porn films yet made. This documentary
tracks down - or, in some cases, fails to track down - those who were
involved directly with the film, including the director, the actors
and even the FBI agent who spent two years working under cover to indict
its Mafia producer. The star, Bambi Woods (above), has disappeared.
Others are dead of unnatural causes. Everyone else involved looks back
with varying degrees of pain and regret. By the end, Debbie Does Dallas
feels more like an act of collective self-harm than a humorous period
romp.
Michael
Holden writes for the Guardian:
I can't watch a documentary about pornography and remain objective
any more than a degenerate gambler can watch the Grand National and
pretend that they're watching a documentary about horses. I so want
the porn industry to be a happy, functional place where everyone wins
that Channel 4's Dark Side Of Porn season is ordinarily the kind of
thing I'd go out of my way to avoid. You too may wish to avoid it -
and indeed the rest of this column - if concepts such as "60 gallons
of semen", "double anal" and "eventually my ass is gonna fall out" are
the kind of thing you have no desire to know about.
While I was shocked to find myself shocked by some of the things in
Porn Shutdown, I was more surprised by how bored I was by Debbie Does
Dallas - Uncovered (Wed, 11.05pm). It can't have been easy making a
tedious documentary about one of the world's highest-grossing sex films,
but they've managed it. Part of the problem, one suspects, is that,
though we might have heard of it, not that many people in Britain have
ever seen it. While Americans were free to watch Debbie Does Dallas
and Deep Throat at the movies, anyone inclined to masturbate in a British
cinema in the 1970s would have found themselves face to face with Robin
Askwith. What this film does deliver is an extraordinary scene in which
you get to watch one-time porn actors - now middle-aged - watching film
of their young selves having sex. They look, understandably, baffled
and a bit sad.
While the film-makers fail in almost all of their stated objectives
- they cannot establish what happened to the money it made or if the
lead actress is even alive - good peripheral characters do emerge. In
particular a retired FBI porn specialist who, when asked which of all
the thing he'd seen offended him most, answers (after a long pause):
"People having sex with snakes."
In the end, the more you see of the porn industry, the more aspects
of it start to resemble any other business. As one actress says, "It's
all about taking it in the ass and smiling," and that's true of many
things in life.
New Sensations Lies
Peter
Ramezap writes on ADT:
Either NS/DS guys are bunch of liars, or they have a moron working
in their art and packaging department, or a moron as an editor.
I just picked up "Pleasures of the Flesh 10" which has the beautiful
Bobbie Eden on the cover. On the back it says:
"Bobbie Eden takes it in the ass! This is worth the price alone. To
see this beautiful vixen with a meat tube up her butt is simply the
best. Join the rest of the cast of model perfect and sexually depraved
sluts as they show case more anal and big cock penetrations than you
can hope for. Winner of the AVN award for best foreign series. Find
out why."
Bobbi Eden might take it in the ass, but it certainly wasn't in this
film. Furthermore, there is only one girl who does anal here. What are
these guys trying to pull? They used to be a good company, what is with
all these false advertisement? are they hitting rock bottom that they
have to lie to sell? Either way, I'm so pissed off I didn't see a new
Bobbi Eden anal that I no longer will spend money on NS/DS products.
The
Big Book of Jewish Conspiracies
The men had fought in WWII or Korea, got married, got good jobs, and
moved to the suburbs. Aside from the occasional trip to a hurried and
harried hooker, and the furtive caresses of their foxhole buddies, their
sexual experience was limite to their wives.
Furtive caresses, or "FC" as it was commonly known,
was WWII-era slang for "XXX man-on-man action," as "The
MPs caught two GIs in an FC behind the PX, and sent them to give the
LT at HQ a BJ ASAP."
Three days later, Moe met at Lou Siegel's restaurant with the two other
divorce attorneys from the greater New York area.
"Look," said Ira Mendelstam, "I want to break up marriages
as much as the next guy, but if a guy wants to look at some naked broad,
he can do it already. Or don't they sell Playboy in Greenwich?"
At the time, Playboy was a fairly respectable publication and luminaries
such as Ray Bradbury, James Jones, and P.G. Wodehouse contributed stories,
with the last also posing for a February pictorial.
"You don't get it, Ira. So a guy looks at Playboy at the barershop,
he gets all worked up, and goes back home to the little missus. Thirty
seconds later, he's sound asleep. But he sees one of these films, he
gets all worked up, and thirty seconds later, he's wondering why she
doesn't do what the girls in the movie do."
Nick East
Publishes His Autobiography - The
Orion Compass
Here's an excerpt:
What would you do if an angel asked you to write a book? Would you
do it? Would you sit down and take the time to write your story and
be painstakingly honest in your account? Well, I was suckered into it
somehow, and this autobiography is the result! I never wanted to write
it-I really didn't-but my guardian angel asked me so nicely that. Anyway,
now it's too late to turn back. Oh well. If you're up for it, come with
me on a magical roller coaster ride to real worlds, imaginary worlds,
Grateful Dead shows, run-ins with the law, the adult porn industry,
soul mates (notice the pluralization), and trips all around the country.
Hypocrisy
is the Homage Vice Pays to Virtue
From the Luke F-rd Fan Blog:
I spoke with a friend Sunday evening about Luke F-rd. Here's a transcript
of our conversation:
Luke F-rd Fan Blogger (LFFB): So, Luke F-rd phoned me Friday. He was
quite agitated.
Luke F-rd Fan Blogger's Friend (LFFBF): Who's Luke F-rd?
LFFB: Oh, some blogger on the Internet.
LFFBF: Ewww! So what was this Luke F-rd dude so annoyed about?
LFFB: He was mad at me for mentioning his p--- blog on my website.
He kept saying "I'll fix your wagon" over and over.
LFFBF: What's a p--- blog?
LFFB: I don't really know. I've only looked at it once or twice --
and then only briefly. I gather he just surfs around the Internet looking
at p--- message boards. Then he copies and pastes some of the posts
onto his blog.
......
LFFB: Well, his memoir was self-published.
LFFBF: Good grief! Luke F-rd self-published an autobiography about
being a p--- blogger?
LFFB: Yeah. But it didn't sell very well.
LFFBF: And you read it?
LFFB: Not really. I just paged through it -- quickly -- what with all
the stories about Luke F-rd "dating" older women. It was kinda creepy.
LFFBF: Older women? You mean Luke F-rd dates women in their forties?
LFFB: No, older.
LFFBF: Women in their fifties?
LFFB: No, older.
LFFBF: Women in their sixties?
LFFB: Yeah, and older still.
Read
on.
Chloe Jones In Hospital
Ed posts:
When Chloe did her Penthouse layout, I thought she was one of, if not
THE most beautiful women I'd ever seen naked. After her initial Penthouse
spread, she became one of the most published nude models, turning up
in just about every major men's magazines strictly solo and for the
most part soft-core. Then she did two or three hardcore boy/girl spreads
shot by Suze Randall and published in Penthouse, all of which were done
with her current boyfriend, but that was the extent of her hardcore
work... three scense (which became pretty legendary).
Around that time, about four years ago, she began escorting through
the old and now defunct Adult Star Fantasies agency, and apparently
shortly thereafter she was severly beaten by a customer... she almost
died from what I've heard. She disappeared and underwent extensive reconstructive
surgery. While she still looks super hot, she doesn't look the way she
use to (which isn't surprising given the circumstances).
After a hiatus of a few years, she returned to the adult industry with
all guns blazing, did one of those Digital Playgound "My Plaything"
interactive boy/girl videos, followed by several big budget hardcore
boy/girl videos promoted highly by her production company (I think Wicked,
but I'm not sure). It looked like she was headed for porn super-stardom.
But similar to Chasey Lain, it seems that Chloe has a major substance
abuse problem; whether or not as a result of her beating I can't say.
After her stint with her first company, she signed with Vivid and became
the newest Vivid Girl. But shortly after her signing she showed up at
a Vivid sponsored high profile industry function in a highly "altered
state", embarrassed Vivid and was dropped by them almost immediately
thereafter... in fact I don't think she ever had the opportunity to
shoot a video for them.
So I don't know if Chloe quit porn, or if porn quit Chloe... much like
Chasey, I think it's a case of the companies dying to have her but worried
about her dependability. I'm sure eventually someone will take a chance
and you'll see a new Chloe Jones DVD on the shelves.
As to the Charlie Sheen incident, who knows? Charlie has a well known
history of frequenting high-end call girls, so it certainly could be
true; on the other hand, I wouldn't consider Chole the most reliable
source given her track-record. My own personal opinion is that Charlie
is smart enough not to pay a girl $15,000 for four hours during which
he received nothing more than a blowjob, and he's rich enough to be
able to afford someone better. No offense to Chloe (I'd truly love to
spend some private time with her... she was one of my original "must
see" ladies), but there are a LOT of younger and higher profile ladies
as hot or hotte than Chloe, including several recent Pets and/or Playmates,
available for $15,000 for a longer date and who would deliver a lot
more than a blowjob. In fact, with the popularity of Charlie's TV series,
Two and a Half Men, I'm sure he could score at Hef's mansion on any
given night without it costing him a dime. My guess? During his younger,
wilder (re: drugs and booze) days, Charlie was a client of Chloe's,
(I think that's an established fact). He's currently in the gossip sheets
because of his breakup with Denise Richards, so he was an easy high-profile
target for Chloe to make a few bucks off of from the National Inquirer
Montana Gunn posts:
Chloe didn't disappear and I have no idea her track record for the
past few years just when she was with ASF and she was great. Now I would
like to inform everyone that I was just with Chloe and she was in critical
condition in the hospital in Houston for more than a month. She was
in coma for 3 weeks after having a severe seizure. While she was unconscious
she had an appendicitis and during a 3 or 4 day attempt to keep her
alive she had lost 3 pints of blood and was getting blood transfusions
for 3 days straight she was going through convulsions and died a few
times but was revived she went through a terrible experience.
She is totally sober and does not do drugs. She is very weak right
now but plans on getting together with me later on next month. I think
Chloe, Raylin. and I are going to be touring the East coast together
as soon as she feels better.
.........
Chloe is back in the hospital. I couldnt find her and kept calling
and found out she is back in the hospital. I am going home from this
sucky Seattle Washington on Saturday and will try to locate where she
is. I think she would appreciate some pleasant words of encouragement
from everyone. i will let you know the address for you to send her a
card. ok. Well everyone say a prayer for her she isnt doing well at
all.
Leanna
Hart Interview
By Rick Ryan
In February I met up with LeeAnna Heart at Bazooka's Showgirls in Kansas
City. LeeAnna has a body that's hard as a rock, and you can tell it's
from long hours at the gym that have toned her to feminine perfection.
She's comes off like one of the guys, but in a wink of an eye she can
become the most seductive woman you ever met after having over 100 porn
flicks behind her now. This meeting was unusual because of the person
that was with her on the road. You'll learn more about that as you read
this exclusive interview with LeeAnna Heart.
RR: LeeAnna, where are you originally from?
LH: I'm from State College Pennsylvania.
RR: Where exactly is that in Pennsylvania?
LH: I think it is Northern Central. It is actually between Pittsburgh
and Harrisburg. In the middle of no mans land.
RR: How did you first get into dancing then porn?
LH: I was just a regular house dancer, and I met a feature by the name
of Harley Rain and she was just a magazine girl. She then hooked me up
with her agent from Universal Entertainment and from there on out Universal
had called up to Los Angeles and actually hooked me up with, I don't remember
the video company name, but Ron Jeremy produced my first four videos and
he made me do four scenes in one day and I thought I was dying.
RR: Who were these scenes with?
LH: One was with my girlfriend Cherry and I think Brooke Ashley may have
been one and Dave Hargman and I think the last one was just a solo girl.
RR: So what year did you start dancing and what year did you start doing
your porn?
LH: I was twenty two when I first started dancing and I won't tell you
how old I am right now but you can do the math. I still look young and
that is all that matters.
RR: What have you been doing in the last year or two?
LH: Actually I shot a movie with Summer Hayes for her line. I don't know
what the name of it is going to be yet but it is Summer Hayes production.
She has her own novelty line where she wants give me a line of where she
has glass dildos and she wants me to have a glass dildo with fiber optic
hearts inside. So I'm hoping to be shooting with her more, and her production
company also wants me to distribute my own stuff on the road. So I'm hoping
to start my own line on the road.
RR: Now, when you're away from the porn business, away at home chilling
out, what do you enjoy doing?
LH: I enjoy being with my family, my parents, and my Mom and I do kick
boxing. And I sort of rest and just do family things when I'm home.
RR: Now you look very petite, give the fans here who don't know you a
description of yourself.
LH: Okay, I'm 5'1" and about 97lbs., light brown hair, brown eyes, 34
small D 22-32. And I'm just learning to kick-box.
RR: Would you kick-box his (Botch) ass here?
LH: I would put my foot right up his ass. He's been a great guy. He's
helped a lot.
RR: You see, Botch's nickname is one hung low.
LH: I've asked him why they call him Botch and he hasn't answered me
yet. One hung low, uh, then I'll have to find out.
RR: Now... it is very unusual. You're the first porn star I've come across
where she has had any type of family traveling with her. I think it is
so cool that your mom is supporting you and traveling with you.
LH: You know, it is great! I don't have to hide anything from anybody.
I can talk about my work with my whole family and my grandparents. They
don't really approve of what I do but they understand what I do. I'm supporting
myself making a living; my mom is traveling with me so they know I'm not
in any kind of trouble. Sex is going to be around forever. They are trying
to get these 6-foot laws into clubs and it may happen or it may not. They
have to understand sex is going to be forever, I don't know who they are
trying to kid. They have to come out of the closet some time or another.
RR: When you go out dancing, what kind of music do you like to dance
to?
LH: I dance to everything and anything and Country is my favorite. I'm
from the down home sticks of Pennsylvania.
RR: Do you have a favorite County singer?
LH: Shania Twain is my girl and I'm waiting to run across her. And I
think she would like me too. We could do a three-way. I sure as hell wouldn't
mind, but we won't go there.
RR: Favorite foods?
LH: Italian foods.
RR: Now do you have a fan club address that people can write to if they
want to?
LH: Yes, I do, its PO Box 644, Lockhaven, PA 17745. Actually my website
right now is Leeannaheart.net. Which could be under construction right
now but soon to be up and running again.
RR: What kind of plans do you have for the near future?
LH: The near future I hope to have my own novelty toy line with Summer
Hayes and my own video production also distributed by Summer Hayes production.
And doing my own thing touring with my Mother and hoping when I retire
to have my own dance club.
RR: Your mom's hot.
LH: My mom is hot. I love my mom. She's my best friend. We go to movies
together, we go to dinner together, and we do everything together. She
keeps me out of trouble, keeps me on the solo path. I think that is one
of the reasons my whole family accepts this. RR: Are you into sports at
all?
LH: I love football, go Eagles! Next year, maybe you bastards! I'm sorry,
I love you guys.
RR: Any last words?
LH: I just want to say I love my fans and I hope everybody loves what
I am doing today and keeps on watching.
LeeAnna's web site is up and running now. Whether or not she ever found
out how hung Botch was (He's the man who helps all the features who perform
at Bazooka's. He even helped Hollie Stevens take her steps towards making
porn. Botch has many notches under his belt! I guess that's why they call
him Botch the Notch!), we'll never know because Botch would never tell.
But aside from that, I was highly impressed with LeeAnna's relationship
with her mom. When I see family giving someone support in an industry
that is always getting rediculed by many, I have great respect for them.
You don't have to approve of it, but at least give family blood support.
LeeAnna's mom was super and hot! If you get the chance to see LeeAnna
in person, please do so. She may not be a young 20-year-old, but she has
the body of one. I'd like to thank the owner of Bazooka's Showgirls, Botch
(and the rest of the staff at Bazooka's like Jimmy), the dancers and LeeAnna
Heart for a great time. Oh! I can't forget about mom! For more information
on Bazooka's Showgirls call (816)421-1915.
Voice Media - Homegrown Video Arbitration Hearing Concludes
All the principles have agreed not to speak publicly about how the hearing
went. The arbitrator will rule in June. Both sides are optimistic about
victory.
I hear that many major players, such as Dave Koenig, had to testify.
A lot of people had to fly in for the hearing and were not happy about
it. I heard a rumor that that group included David van der Pool of Python,
who some documentation suggests is the owner of CE aka Trade News Corp.
According to two industry sources, and this is completely unconfirmed
speculation, the hearing went Homegrown's way.
Thursday afternoon, I interviewed Voice Media attorney Ira Rothken about
his clients AdultFriendFinder and Steamray. That runs below.
Skeeter
Kerkove - Registered Sex Offender
From the photograph, it looks like this offense took place in the last
five years.
His offense? "SEXUAL PENETRATION WITH FOREIGN OBJECT BY FORCE."
So I searched Skeeter under his real name "Arland Kerkove"
and only found
one result -- this letter he sent to ADT reviewer Houston Don in May
of 2001:
Houston Don does not like Bridgette kerkove. Thank god hundreds of
thousands of fans around the world do not feel the same way. Who is
the most video taped porn star since Jan. 1999? Bridgette Kerkove is
your correct answer. Bridgette has done over 450 movies since jan. 1999.
That is a record that will never be broken.
The bottom line in porn for a girl is to make as much as possible.
Money is what it is all about. When Bridgette was in her 10th month
of porn, she already bought a 4 bedroom 4 bath home on a mountaintop
with a beautiful view of the valley. Then she bought a new S-type Jaguar,
new truck and puts money away every week for retirement. Bridgette was
not having an off day two years ago when Tai blow was filmed in 105
degree heat. Lex was having a very bad day that day. Lots of wood problems.
It was so hot he was over heating. Watch the video, you clearly see
Lex get all of his 12 inches deep in her ass, to his balls. Watch carefully,
you will clearly see Bridgette rubbing her own clit so she can cum for
real, like she always does. There is some editing and audio problems,
but her screaming is real, when she has a buildup and had to really
work hard for her orgasam.
Be proud of Bridgette, she is the richest girl in porn under the age
of 30. Nobody can keep up with her schedule, nobody is that solid, nobody
in porn is that reliable. When it comes to doing porn movies, nobody
does it more then Bridgette. The fans love it. She gets 1 to 2 grocery
bags of fan mail every week. At the last CES show, sometimes her fan
line had over 50 people waiting, thats alot. Don't be so hard on implants,
who cares, f--- it! Its not a big deal. Let the disgusting child molestors,
be negative about implants, those freaks are always obsessed with the
natural look. Just say no to the pedophiles. Love women, love them,
respect them, mysogomy is a disease. God bless everygirl who does their
best in a porno movie, Skeeter Kerkove
Here is Skeeter's IMDB
profile.
I emailed Skeeter about this but all of my email addresses for him bounced
back.
One employer of Skeeter's comments: "Come on Luke, give me a break,
registered sex offenders make the best porn."
Another porner writes:
I know nothing about the Skeeter thing except that there he is on the
Megan's Law site, & only XPT even took note, & big bad "I'll confront
anybody" Jeff Steward had the link deleted. AVN, of course, buries all
negative aspects of the business in their own interest. Considering
how much they've hyped him since day one (Funny how AVN jumped on the
anal sex bandwagon with the rise in power of Master Damien), so that
at this point just about anybody he wants will hire him, this is, um,
"not newsworthy" in the middle of a rising battle to convince the public
pornographers are not in fact felons, white slavers & scumbags in general.
Jennifer
Rosenblatt's AVN Lawsuit Going To Arbitration
Various industry journalists are on the plaintiff's witness list including
Gene Ross and Tod Hunter and a ton of ex-AVN employees in addition to
numerous players in the biz.
Kenny Guarino, Steve Hirsch, Steve Orenstein and others may be dragged
into this dispute.
Apparently, the first law firm Jenn hired she quickly decided were incompetent
and she's going to sue them. It may be this law firm's fault that the
case is going to arbitration instead of to court. Jenn's initial attorney
may not have filed necessary paperwork on time.
I believe Jenn's team made several offers to settle but Paul Fishbein
and his team decided to fight this to the bitter end.
I suspect both sides have damaging info on the other. I don't understand
why this isn't being settled. It will get ugly. Both sides sound confident
of victory.
I hear this will be the best look inside of AVN ever. It's the first
time AVN has been sued.
There's an old saying that you never know your lover until the divorce.
Jenn and Paul were such good friends (not romantically) that this is like
a divorce. I am not sure how ready each of them are for how hardball the
other is going to play.
A Chat With Craig
Valentine
I call him Thursday.
Craig: "We love the porn agents. Their job is to put as many girls
as possible in movies so they can make their fee. Jim [South] is a nice
old man. He doesn't eat much at dinner, though.
"I won't name this particular booking agent. When porn girls get
a good name, everyone wants to see them in the clubs. If an agent wants
to book Entertainer X into a club, and they don't want her, he will put
Entertainer W in there. His fee of 12% doesn't change. So he doesn't care
who he sticks into a club.
"All the [feature booking] agents are screwing all the girls now.
Unless you kiss their ass and are in their circle, or you are their favorite,
you don't get booked. There are some big-named porn stars who don't get
booked [because of favoritism by the bookers].
"If you go to a strip club, you see the same stupid girl doing the
same stupid show.
"If you call your agent and say why aren't in this club, he'll say
the club doesn't want you. Then you'll get a call from the club asking
why you won't perform at their club. The agent lied to you.
"This one agent placed a phone call to Summer, threatening her and
threatening to destroy her credit. He even forged a contract that the
club owner presented to us when we got there.
"He sends threatening letters to clubs around the US and bashes
her and other girls over the phone so they can't get work.
"You
wrote about the Miss Nude World pageant [scam]. I'll name Ken Shinkle
[who is married to the recently crowned Miss Nude USA/Miss Nude Universe
Jada Deville]. He's always packing on the weight. He used to work for
Continental Agency.
"When we bought the sex toy company, we were supposed to do a free
showcase for that sonofabitch. I said, 'I'm about ready to write a check
for $500,000. I'm not going to do your showcase for free when I'm ready
to buy a multi-million dollar business.'
"He classifies himself as G-d and the Anti-Christ. You will bend
over and kiss his ass or you will never work in the industry again. If
Summer Haze does not do his showcase for free to see how she performs,
he will make sure he never works for any clubs in the United States."
Duke: "Does he have that power?"
Craig: "The majority of club owners are not that bright. They listen
to the agents. If the club owners were smart, they'd go on AVN and see
who the hot people are.
"Let's get real. When you go to a club, do you want to see a girl
dancing and rubbing herself with lotion? Or do you want to see a girl
take a dildo as long as your arm and ---- the living ---- out of herself?"
I don't know what to say.
"If you go to a club to see a porn star, you know what the porn
star does for a living. Then you have these dancing feature girls who
do little shows and tricks and pour paint on themselves. I don't see any
reason for a guy to pay $20 to get in the door to see a girl paint herself.
"I like to go to a club to see Danny Sexton ---- herself with a
beer bottle. Or I see the girls do a strap-on show and ---- the ---- out
of each other or blow the guys on stage. That's a show. What else would
you go to a titty bar for? Dude, you live in LA. You get everything else
you need.
"We are in the porn business. It's hard to impress us nowadays.
If a girl pulls a bunny rabbit out of her ass, I'd be impressed for a
minute. I'm pretty sure you'd stand there and say, I can't put that on
the recorder.
"You know Leanna Hart.
The agents are blackballing her to make sure she can't work. She needs
money because she has a son to take care of. These girls are booking themselves
into clubs and screwing the agents.
"There's a powerful agent who classifies girls as A-list, B-list.
Every club owner in the world wants Tera Patrick, Jenna Jameson and Brianna
Banks. If these club owners had $35,000 a week to throw away on a feature
entertainer of this calibre, they'd be out of business.
"You're friends with Lisa Sparxxx. She's a well-known name. Why
wouldn't they want to put Lisa in the club?
"Flexxx the sexual contortionist. The agent who books her won't
put her in clubs because she won't make her tits any bigger. I'm sorry,
but if a girl can bend over backwards and lick her own pussy, who gives
a ---- what her tits look like?"
Duke: "Right."
Craig: "A C is perfect. I'm pretty sure that if you saw a girl bend
over backwards and lick her own pussy, I'm pretty sure you'd drop the
recorder.
"Taya Parker. This wonderful girl came up to me at Exotic Dancer
and handed me a package. It had hand-writing comparisons and attorneys
against Rio Rivers and the Miss Nude World pageants proving that the contest
was rigged.
"Taya is now kissing Ken Shinkle's ass because she doesn't have
any work. So he's booking her into clubs to shut her up from this package
circulating.
"The most powerful booking agent is Lee Network run by Dave Michaels,
a moron. Number two is Continental. Frank, the owner of Continental, is
a nice guy, but he don't do anything.
"We went up against Tera Patrick last summer. We packed over a thousand
people into the club Summer was performing at with a line going out the
door.
"I was on Playboy radio with Juli Ashton and Nina Hartley. They
said that the reason they stopped featuring was that the agents kept screwing
them.
"[Journalist] Don Benn went through this already. He tried sniffing
out a couple of the agents and talking to them. He felt stupider after
talking to the agents then when he started.
"About two years ago, we were on this wonderful show called the
Smut Doctors.
The two fat kids. They all forget that I used to be one of the real popular
DJs here in Florida for one of the biggest strip clubs -- Crazy Horse
Too. These guys have a secure job at Tootsies. They wanted us to do a
blowjob contest. Don't we get paid for that on set? When the girls do
that on my films, I have to pay them to do a blowjob scene. Why should
we give a radio show that nobody sees video on? At least when we do a
live sex shows on KSEX, everyone is tuned in listening.
"A couple of weeks later, the Smut Doctors had her on as a regular
guest. I called up. What's the deal? Well, her agent says she's not a
porn star. Really? Here are 30 of her DVDs and 50 VHS tapes. Thirty five
magazines. I dropped off to them.
"They said, the agent says that is not important. We are going to
go with what he said.
"Wankus [at KSEXradio.com] is very nice. He believes that everybody
is entitled to a piece of the pie. He's not greedy. We told him what happened.
"Summer goes to feature at that club and she gets cancelled. And
she keeps getting cancelled and cancelled and cancelled.
"Someone writes to the DJ at SmutDoctors, and his response was:
'She was mean to me. So I don't feel she should be allowed to make money
in my club.'
"OK, fat boy. You don't own the club.
"Summer Haze went to a club. All the porn girls had flaked on them.
While she was in the dressing room, she interviewed all the girls, including
Rio Rivers. She wrote down, word-for-word, what the girls said. The girls
were saying the place was a joke. That Rio lied to everybody.
"Rio said, yeah, 20 of my girls didn't show up. She was paying other
girls to fill in. She was trying to hide all this from the club owner.
Her posters said, '26 of the top porn stars.' The only girls there that
did adult film were Summer Haze, Xena, and Mercedez. How can you have
porn star wars when there are no porn stars?
"Summer did the favor and did the show. She f----- herself with
a big glass fibreoptic dildo on stage. I had Lance [Xena's husband] run
around the stage with an inflatable penis. It was killer.
"We don't publish the story. We felt bad for Rio.
"Then, a couple of weeks later, we get a magazine in hand, and not
only did Summer not get thanked for doing the show, but one of the girls
who took her finger and touched her pussy got the Hardcore Award. I'm
sorry, but a girl f------ herself on stage and a guy running around with
a six-foot inflatable penis trying to ---- her with it while she's trying
to f--- herself with a dildo, I think that's more hardcore than a girl
taking her finger and touching her clit.
"Not even a thank you for bailing her out.
"So Summer went ahead and printed the story, word-for-word, what
all the girls told her.
"Then we got a call from the club owner that we trashed the club.
The agent, Ken Shinkle, said she bashed the club. At no time, did she
bash the club.
"Daisy May Madison.
She's in Behind Closed Doors 4. AVN didn't rate the scene too highly.
They rated her as a dumb stripper. It's not an act. The girl is stupid.
"I videotaped her signing a contract. This little idiot turned around...
We promised her a boxcover. She was supposed to give us three scenes.
The girl didn't give us three scenes. The girl barely gave us one scene.
We turned around and said, unless you give us the other two scenes, we're
not going to put you on the boxcover.
"The guy we rented the studio from offered to buy 5,000 copies of
the disc. We put his girl on the boxcover. He wired the money right to
me.
"I got a phone call that the reason Daisy May Madison didn't make
the boxcover is that she didn't suck my dick. Don't flatter yourself.
Sucking my dick doesn't get you a boxcover. Money gets the boxcovers.
Performance in the movie gets the boxcover. Honoring your contract gets
you the boxcover.
"We caught this girl bootlegging one of the DVDs and recreated the
art work so that she was the star of the disk.
"When I was on the Wankus show, I'm called dumb suitcase pimp. I'm
worth a couple of million dollars and own a load of houses. Whatever money
Summer Haze makes, Summer Haze keeps."
Craig goes off on the fake titles strippers use to pad their resumes.
"What's Miss Nude Connecticutt? I like Jennifer Steele who can shoot
fire out of her pussy and set a guy's face on fire on stage. That's cool.
What's Miss Nude Wyoming going to do? Bring a cow on stage?
"The only thing that Summer wants in this world is an AVN award.
The agent says, it doesn't mean anything if you have an AVN award. Apparently
it is the biggest event of the year. If you walk off that stage with an
award, doesn't it mean that somebody paid attention to what you did?
"These girls are busting their asses. Let them have an award.
"We packed 1,500 people into Club Seven for a swingers party [during
AEE]. Dave Cummings was there. If Summer's name doesn't draw people, why
do they come?"
More to come.
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